Cassidy Teaches to "Stroke 'Em Condom Style": An Extremely Detailed Breakdown
Yo, listen up. Cassidy has a public service announcement, and it's mad serious and relevant to your lifes.
When you see a hot-ass mami and she's shakin' her jelly, you've got to get in it. But you can't be lovin' them guts raw, dawg. Like Snoop said: "Ain't no pussy good enough to get burned while I'm up in it."
Some of y'all be sleepin' in the goodie trap. Some of y'all think it's just a game. So Cassidy is reminding you that freakin' be serious business, and he's doing it "Condom Style."
Yes, this is what you think it is - a remix by the popular Philly rapper of Psy's infamous "Gangnam Style," meant to spur thought and conversation about unhealthy sexual lifestyles. We're all doing it, but not all of us are doing it responsibly.
But does this video make you wanna get freaky with a rubber on? Let's find out.
0:00 - 0:24
Attention, attention. "The Hustler" is lettin' y'all know "going raw is out of the question." He's also got some pretty fly kicks, and is letting you know that pink is pimpin.
0:25 - 0:52
Bro goes in on this tale about a hoe named Stephanie who was feelin' him up, and thought she was hot and bad as fuck, Cassidy knows there are no exceptions. She was kind of mad that he had it on, as some nasty ratchet's might be like to do, but in that situation, you've got to remember your condom style. Be like Cassidy. He ain't listening to no hoes tell him they're pregnant, and neither should you.
0:53 - 1:14
Alright, the PSA rap was raw enough, but we wish a little bit Cassi-baby would have hired someone to do the musical vocals. Singing might not be his secret talent. Let's hope he's a better smasher between the sheets. At least he's not a slave to auto-tune.
1:15 - 1:45
And there it is. The hook. "Stroke 'em condom style." We can definitely see ourselves singing this one before getting freaky. And hopefully more of you will, too. It looks like plenty of people in these mean streets will be getting busy. Cassidy and his homies are passing out condoms to the whole damn city, and that's the way it should be. Can we get a visit from the Cassidy condom bus here in Miami, please?
1:46 - 2:38
Speaking of Miami, Cass is speaking our language. Caliente Spanish ladies are sexy, too, but as the song says, unprotected sex is a "no-no" in any lingua. Cassidy gives no fucks without wrapping up his buck. You never know.
2:39 - 3:06
The hook is back and Cassidy proves that he made the song with a few in-the-studio clips. We continue to be inundated with the glittery-gold Icon condoms. So far, we're not necessarily turned on by any of this, but we're definitely horrified by the idea of getting AIDS or having babies. Ain't nobody got time for that.
3:07 - 3:49
Look, Cassidy keeps it real. We've all made mistakes, and he's fucked 'em raw before. But not no more. It's never too late to become a more responsible adult, and there's no time like the present. Cassidy hits the mall with his crew to pick up a few broads and spread the love-gloves around. You can pick up condoms for free at any local health clinic, as well as get tested for HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. In today's fast-paced world, there's always time to wrap it. Just remember this little song when you get it on, and stroke 'em condom style.
Get the ICYMI: Today's Top Stories Newsletter Our daily newsletter delivers quick clicks to keep you in the know
Catch up on the day's news and stay informed with our daily digest of the most popular news, music, food and arts stories in Miami, delivered to your inbox Monday through Friday.