Is Twitter threatening the success of online dating services? "No," according to Mark Brooks, an analyst and consultant for the online dating industry. Brooks presented a panel late last month at the iDate2010 conference in Miami Beach. He recapped the past year's successes and failures in the online dating industry but barely mentioned the potential of Twitter to generate love matches.
This got Silicon Beach thinking: Surely, there will always be a need for online dating services; they're also social networks. But it begs the question: What about Twitter?
Here are some ways Twitter can be useful and even desirable for dating:
1. Sometimes we trust communities more than individuals.
When you're on a dating site, it's just you and the sea of fish. You're hoping to find the one all on your own without a friend, relative, or colleague to give you the dirt. Though there are services today to protect dating site users from fraud (Silicon Beach will write about that soon), there's nothing like having peers watching over you.
And if you're part of a well-established social networking group, you had better watch your
ass if you're not being honest.
Example: Jane dates Joe. Both are in your network. You find out about
his real girlfriend. Did everyone know the sneaky bastard had one?
No, because he never talked about her and never brought her to any
tweetups. Not cool. Jane ends the relationship. Joe is tolerated, but
it's never the same.
You can't get that kind of community watchdog program by flying solo on a dating site that is moderated by computer algorithms.
2. Twitter lets you become acquainted in the town square, not the alley.
When
you meet someone on Twitter before you meet in person, chances are
it wasn't some random follow. Maybe you found him or her because of a
Follow Friday or because you eavesdropped on a conversation. You
began talking, threw around a few jokes, and clicked. By the time you
met face-to-face at a tweetup, it felt
natural, even though you might've had some butterflies in your belly.
There was nothing weird or strange about it. You couldn't be complete
strangers even if you tried, because you were already part of a
community.
3. You date because you want to meet people. Duh!
Many
people think Twitter addicts are recluses who can't handle real-life
social interaction. That might be the case for some, but for others,
nothing could be further from the truth.
Once you establish
yourself in a Twitter network and begin going to tweetups, you realize
there is no more natural and organic way to meet people. You aren't
going to a gathering with an agenda; you're just being you, hanging out
with like-minded people, and having a good time. There's no pressure, no
stress, no nerves, and no extra expense. What better place to meet "the
one" or at least a potential date when you're relaxed and have no
expectations?
The odds are in your favor. The more people you
meet, the greater your chances. It's like speed dating at a slower
pace, with a whole community of acquaintances and friends to keep it
light and fun.
4. Tweetups get you out of the house.
If
you're on the market for a date, sitting in front of your computer and
nitpicking through potential profiles is keeping you
from stepping out. Get out there and be social. This will help you warm up for that first date.
It could be
a wake up call too. Maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised when you meet
someone you weren't expecting to meet, even if he or she
doesn't qualify according to your grand list of requirements.
5. People do meet and hook up without ever posting a profile on a dating site.
Yours
truly knows many examples, including her own romance, which would've
never happened without Twitter. Other couples in the South Florida or
peripheral Twitter networks have met, dated, gotten engaged, or married. All met in the manner described above, in a community of
peers, at ease and with no particular agenda. All share one common
denominator: Twitter.
6. Use what works best for you.
Obviously,
dating sites have many advantages to Twitter, such as searches for
potential matches. Some sites focus on niche communities, which
is crucial if you're into a particular lifestyle. If all you
want is a booty call, you know where to look.
But if you're
serious about meeting someone, don't knock Twitter as a platform. It might not
replace a dating social network, but it's definitely an alternative.
And
if you think dating sites provide a safety net or
guarantee, think again. That's all going to change radically in the
next few years, when dating will become more spontaneous through mobile
phone geo-location-based apps that imitate -- you guessed it -- the spontaneity of Twitter.
