International Noise Conference 2014's 140-Act Lineup and Set Times

Squeal, noise junkies! The transcendent din of INC 2014 is almost upon us.

Soon, there will be sabotaged guitars buzzing in the toilet, a sextet of howling amps getting kicked around the mosh pit, and maybe even obsolete electronics in flames.

But as any International Noise Conference vet will gleefully screech into your already bleeding ear: "No laptops!"

See also: Top Ten Completely Insane Moments From International Noise Conference

Over the last 11 years, founder and local noise-rock legend Frank "Rat Bastard" Falestra has welcomed thousands of screamers, shredders, and sonic sadomasochists of all sorts to the carpeted stage at Churchill's Pub for highly experimental and occasionally deranged performances featuring mangled mics, smashed axes, destroyed drums, amplified shards of broken glass, and horrendously abused Marshall cabs, as well as non-musical materials like vomit and other human bodily fluids.

In short, any uninitiated member of the INC 2014 audience should anticipate a totally unhinged and utterly unpredictable aesthetic experience. (Also, it will take place over the course of five consecutive nights. The sets will last "15 minutes or less," in accordance with longstanding conference protocol. The lineup will feature in excess of 140 artists. And the beer will cost about $5 per 16-ounce can. But the cover will be absolutely fucking free.)

Officially, the skull-rattling cacophony begins Tuesday, February 4, at approximately 8 p.m. with this year's opening freakfest for which infamous Night of Weirds curator and freeform music aficionado Jeff Rollason has assembled an all-star roster of 15 aural berserkers, including Miami arty party boy Dino Felipe, the ominously named Vomitorium, and Rat Bastard himself. As far as Rollason's concerned, it could be "the best night of INC" because it's "Miami bands only." And duh, the 305 is awesome.

Of course, though, the conference's dozens of national noise purveyors -- from North Carolina's Clang Quartet to Philadelphia's Newton, New York City's Jane Pain and Reverend Mother Flash, and perhaps especially Minneapolis's self-proclaimed "pride of North American noise," Cock E.S.P. -- would certainly take exception at any suggestion of Miami's supremacy. And no one wants a Second Avenue noise battle to the death or a public crap-off to settle some obscure regional beef, right?

Well, actually, casualties would certainly suck, but a literal shit show might be the perfect finale for INC 2014.

Tuesday, February 4

Curated by Night of Weirds

8:40 p.m. Dracula (Miami)

9:00 p.m. Laundry Room Squelchers 2 (Miami)

9:20 p.m. Ferrari and friends (Miami)

9:40 p.m. Self n Other (Miami)

10:00 p.m. Secret gg (Miami)

10:20 p.m. Liz Tracy (Miami)

10:40 p.m. Main Manatee (Miami)

11:00 p.m. F.U. (Miami)

11:20 p.m. Meandream (Miami)

11:40 p.m. Vomitorium (Miami)

12:00 a.m. Humbert (Miami)

12:20 a.m. Dino Felipe & "The Band" (Miami)

12:40 a.m. Bmg music club (Miami)

1:00 a.m. Fangus Humangus (Miami)

1:20 a.m. Prescott Winthorpe Sims (Miami)

All Night INC: Spending Noize Night, curated by Julian Del Rio, on the back patio

See also: Wolf Eyes' John Olson Says Noise Music Is Over: "Completely, 100 Percent"

Wednesday, February 5

Begins at 9 p.m., Ends at 3 a.m.

-Nunhex (Miami)

-Meddling Kids (Miami)

-Aspartame (Miami)

-Samsara (Miami)

-Worm Wedding Ring (Miami)

-For The Virgin Mary (Miami)

-Astrokats (Miami)

-Smut (Miami)

-Death Talisman VII (Hollywood, FL)

-Fuck The Ramones (Hollywood, FL)

-Shroud Eater (Miami)

-Jellyfish Putas (Miami)

-Bag Hag (Miami)

-Normads (Miami)

-Hell Mouth (Miami)

-Sad Ghost

-Plomo o Plata: Ed Matus & Omar Angulo (Miami)

-Bobby Flan (Miami)

-Chris Donaldson (Miami)

-GG Mozart (Miami Beach)

-Shark Dust Sisters (Fort Lauderdale)

-Russel Mofsky (Miami)

-The Weeds: Adam Matza (Fort Lauderdale)

-A Love Supreme Sextet (Hollywood)

-ALT MIA, on the back patio

-Jellyfish Bros, in the Dan Hosker Studio

Thursday, February 6

Begins at 8 p.m., Ends at 3 a.m.

-Laundry Room Squelchers (Miami Beach)

-Holly Hunt (Miami Beach)

-Su Sous Toulouse en Rouge (St. Petersburg)

-Clang Quartet (Stokesdale, NC)

-Shitstorm (Miami)

-Last (Fort Lauderdale)

-Rauh (Gainesville)

-Nick Klein (New York City)

-Otto Von Shirach + Mr Feathers + Nayib Estefan (Miami)

-Dot Dot Dot Orchestra (Fort Lauderdale)

-Jesse Vance (St. Petersburg)

-Human Fluid Rot (Fort Lauderdale)

-Chrome Dick (Miami)

-Temple of Bon Matin (Pompano Beach)

-Xela Zaid + Eric Lopez + Ed Wicox (Miami)

-Steve Bristol & Joe Gallant (Boca Raton/New York City)

-Jamison Williams & Steve Bristol (Jacksonville/Boca Raton)

-Michael Feathers (Miami)

-Jiblet Dupree (Clearwater/Polk City)

-Roover Hook (Miami Beach)

-Sharlyn Evertsz (Miami Beach)

-Jackie Ransom (Miami)

-No Milk (Tampa)

-Microwave Windows (Sarasota)

-Viking Funeral

-Durastatic: Josh Boutwell (Miami)

-Whitey Alabastard: Nick Boutwell (Fort Myers)

-Jonathan Handcock (Cincinnati)

-Steve Malagodi & Gustavo Matamoros (Miami)

-Roofless (Back Patio)

-Spring Break/The End (Dan Hosker Studio)

Friday, February 7

Curated by Todd Lynne

Begins at 8 p.m., Ends at 3 a.m.

-Homeland (Boston)

-Dim Past (Miami)

-Burnt Hair (Jacksonville)

-Lord God Almighty (Montreal)

-Jeff Rehnlund (Raleigh)

-Esclaves (Montreal)

-Body Garden (Miami)

-LSDV (Boston)

-Cheetoh Haze (Myakka, FL)

-SPQR (Tampa)

-Newton (Philadelphia)

-Hell Garbage (Lakeland)

-Jane Pain (New York City)

-Negatory (Orlando)

-i_like_dog_face (Tampa)

-Oubliette (Clyo, GA)

-Human Adult Band (New Brunswick)

-Phantom Selector (New Brunswick)

-Fish Wife (Tampa)

-Classic Misfortune (Carrboro, NC)

-Lovebrrd (St. Petersburg)

-Kein (Miami)

-Shit Horse Band (Lakeland)

-Other Organs (Tarpon Springs)

-Haves&Thirds (Tampa)

-Kenny Millions: BeCreative or Die, on the back patio)

-Ocean Meets the Sky, curated by Xela Zaid, in the Dan Hosker Studio

Saturday, February 8

Begins at 3 p.m., Ends at 3 a.m.

-Cock E.S.P. (Minneapolis)

-Tinnitustimulus (Rochester)

-Burak (Philadelphia)

-Noise Nomads (Northampton, MA)

-Andy Borsz (Jacksonville)

-Dromez (Austin)

-Breakdancing Ronald Reagan (Austin)

-Bang! Bros. (Boston)

-This is My Condition (Lawrence, KS)

-Bromp Treb (Northampton MA)

-Kenny Millions (Hollywood, FL)

-Reverend Mother Flash (New York City)

-Nequam Sonitus (St. Petersburg)

-Finkbeiner (Rochester NY)

-Profligate (Carrboro, NC)

-Bernard Herman (New York City)

-Unicorn Hard-on (Nashville)

-Leslie Keffer (Nashville)

-Sharkiface & Julia (Oakland)

-Eva Aguila (Los Angeles)

-SHV (Providence, RI)

-Irene Moon (New York City)

-La Femme Natal (New York City)

-Yohimbe (Carrboro NC)

-Radio Shock (New York City)

-Lazer Slut (Nashville)

-Loop Retard (Madison, WI)

-Secret Boyfriend (Carrboro, NC)

-Chris Dooley (Northampton, MA)

-Mutwawa (Richmond, VA)

-Daggering (Richmond, VA)

-Wayne Paine (Los Angeles)

-Horaflora (Boston)

-Pvre Matrix (New York City)

-Now's (Atlanta)

-Iovae (Cincinnati)

-Drums Like Machine Guns (Philadelphia)

-Pony Payroll Bones (Atlanta)

-Ironing (Gainesville)

-Dubb Normal (Chocolocco AL)

-Embarker (Philadelphia)

-Suicide Magnets (Philadelphia)

-Twilight Memories of the Three Suns (Washington, D.C.)

-The Idiots (New York City)

-Trotsky's Watercooler (Orlando)

-Vasectomy Party (Sarasota/Bradenton)

-Salt Swan (Nashville TN)

-Electric Cactus (Carrboro, NC)

-Night of Weirds III @ I.N.C.

International Noise Conference 2014. Tuesday to Saturday, February 4 to 8. Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE Second Ave., Miami. Admission is free. Call 305-757-1807 or visit churchillspub.com.

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