According to every wave of punk rock, the genre has been dying since it was born.
Crossfade disagrees. We firmly believe that, despite decades of embarrassment and confusion, only now is punk rock truly reaching peak appropriation within popular culture.
Case in point: CBS has announced a new sitcom named after grunge icons Nirvana's era-defining single, "Smells Like Teen Spirit."
The plot description features titillating hash-taggables such as, "multi-billion dollar Internet company" and "1990s indie-rock parents." Can you think of anything that better embodies the notion of le poseur?
We're afraid to say we can. Just check out our five worst moments in punk rock poserdom.
See also:
-Ten Raging Punks (And Other Rockers) Who Crashed the Daytime Talk Show Circuit
-Seven Least Punk Rock Moments in Punk Rock History
-John Lydon (AKA Johnny Rotten) Is Still a Total Asshole: His Ten Shittiest Moments
-Is Punk Rock the New Dad Rock? Ten Signs That Going Soft Is the New Hardcore
5. Hot Topic Founded in 1988 by Posers
Let's get things a'goin' with every poser's one-stop shoppe for heavy-handed accessories. Nothing says, "You're just jealous because the voices don't speak to you," like a shirt that says, "You're just jealous because the voices don't speak to you."
4. Posers Rip Off Kurt Cobain and Flipper
You could probably solve the global energy crisis if you figured out how to convert the centripetal force of Kurt Cobain's perpetually rolling-in-its-grave corpse into renewable, gluten-free energy. We wonder if Forever 21 even realized there was a band called "Flipper" and that Kurt's homemade tee wasn't just expressing an appreciation for the famous bottlenose dolphin.
3. Mickey Mouse: Damned to Poserdom
Jesus F. Christ! How many dead rock star legacies need to be soiled in the name of norm-hipster mall fashion? For the record, between these two ripped-off designs we're looking at two junkies, two suicides, and a hanging. When is Urban Outfitters going to sell a printed tee depicting dead-ass G.G. Allin getting a blowjob?
2. Wrestler/Poser Name Themselves After Sid Vicious (Who Was Also a Poser)
If we learned anything from SLC Punk, it's that posers never die. And Sid Vicious is predominantly famous for dying. Furthermore, professional wrestler "Sycho" Sid Vicious ended up slumming it as a crazy obsessed with repeating (and defeating) Bill Goldberg's undefeated tenure in the now-defunct WCW. So ... Sycho Sid, we dub thee a poser.
1. Green Day's American Idiot Sucks and Is For Posers
Billie Joe Armstrong is a ninny and so is Abel Folgar.
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