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Why You Be Frontin’?

The last time you went out to the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, you found that your only company on the drive home were the cartoon moths flying out of your pants’ empty, out-turned pockets. Expensive drinks (and women who want them) can drain your bank account quicker than an e-thief with your social security number. What’s a dude to do? How about tapping into jai alai and Texas hold-em poker? That’s right, Dania Jai-Alai Sports Center has got what you’re lookin’ for: piña coladas, daiquiris, wings, hot dogs, draft beer, and reserved seating -- each for only 99 cents.

You’ll feel like a Twenties millionaire as you poshly push quarters toward the counter and receive a bounty in return, you suave devil, you. Then place a bet, slide into your reserved seat, and try to figure out what’s going on. (Hint: It’s similar to tennis, but faster and, ya know, deadlier). Or say “Phooey!” to actually gambling and make up your own stories about what’s transpiring in the fronton. Who wins? You do, silly. You’ve still got all of your folding money!
Wed., June 13


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