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Calendar for the week

thursday
march 5
Doral-Ryder Open: We have to admit that ever since Gerald Ford stopped missing the green and hitting the spectators with his errant drives, golf has lost a bit of its action-packed appeal. But the Doral-Ryder Open (in its 37th year, the longest-running PGA Tour event in the state) can still enthrall. Today through Sunday at the Doral Golf Resort and Spa (4400 NW 87th Ave.), defending champion Steve Elkington and 143 leading players will compete for a share of two million dollars in prize money. Tee time is 7:30 a.m. today and tomorrow and 8:30 a.m. Saturday and Sunday. Tickets cost $40. Call 477-4653. (NK)

Maria Schneider: If you know jazz or want to know more about jazz, you should know avant-garde, post-bop composer, arranger, and bandleader Maria Schneider. This chick cooks -- and we're not talking food. A prodigy from Windom, Minnesota, she began studying piano at age five. After earning a master's from the Eastman School of Music, she moved to New York and worked as an assistant to pianist-composer-arranger Gil Evans from 1985 to 1988. Since then Schneider has composed pieces for the Woody Herman and Mel Lewis bands, worked alongside harmonica player Toots Thielemans, conducted orchestras all over Europe and the United States, and released two albums, both nominated for Grammys. Tonight at 8:00 Schneider comes to Gusman Concert Hall (1314 Miller Dr., Coral Gables) at the University of Miami (where she studied for a short time) to lead the University of Miami Concert Jazz Band. Admission is free. Call 284-5813. (NK)

friday
march 6
Feast with the Beasts: Munch with the monkeys, indulge with the invertebrates, repast with the ruminants, all to benefit the Zoological Society of Florida. This black-tie event attracts more than 1500 people who will trek to Metrozoo (12400 SW 152nd St.) tonight at 8:00 and participate in an extravagant gorge-fest featuring food from more than 40 top South Florida restaurants -- Chef Allen's, China Grill, Christy's, to name a few. Trumpeter Arturo Sandoval headlines the multitudinous musical acts, which include Joe Donato, the Goods, Orpheus, and the Vivace Strings. Dancers and magicians will also entertain. Tickets cost $150; $500 will buy you the title of Beastkeeper and will get you into a special reception at 7:00 p.m. Call 255-5551. (NK)

Miami International Orchid Show: Rambo loves orchids. Who knew the tough guy had a soft spot for flowers? Sylvester Stallone has been named honorary chairman of this year's Miami International Orchid Show, even though his daughter Sophia Rose is named after a different bloom. (The people at the South Florida Orchid Society are savvy; they plan to name a special orchid after Sophia.) Today and tomorrow from 10:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m., and Sunday from 10:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. at the Coconut Grove Convention Center (2700 S. Bayshore Dr., Coconut Grove) more than 200 vendors will display and sell thousands of exotic flowers at the largest orchid event in the Americas. Horticulturists will conduct walking tours of the show and give demonstrations and lectures about growing orchids. Admission is nine dollars. Call 255-3656. (NK)

Winter Party Weekend: The Dade Human Rights Foundation, devoted to promoting awareness about gay, lesbian, and transgender issues, throws its annual Winter Party (or parties) today through Sunday on Miami Beach. Winter be damned; the theme is "Tropical Fantasy." Festivities begin tonight at 9:30 with the Tropical Heat dance party at the Warsaw Ballroom (1450 Collins Ave.), continue tomorrow at 7:00 p.m. with the Tropical Deco VIP cocktail party at the Raleigh Hotel (1175 Collins Ave.), and culminate Sunday at noon in an all-afternoon beach dance party (Ocean Drive and Fourteenth Street). Tickets range from $30 to $75. Call 538-2712. (NK)

Doral-Ryder Open: See Thursday.

saturday
march 7
Winter Music Conference: Dance music is alive and well and living in Miami Beach, at least for the next five days, as the Winter Music Conference rolls on. More than 2500 delegates from all over the world will convene at the Fontainebleau Hilton and Resort Towers (4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach) to participate in a series of events such as panel discussions, seminars, and the International Dance Music Awards. A DJ spinoff, new-artist showcases, and a slew of performances will also take place at various South Beach nightclubs (see "Clubs," page 92). Registration costs $325. Ticket prices for the nightclub shows vary according to venue. Call 954-563-4444. (NK)

The Raft: Anyone who thinks Miami is becoming homogeneous is in for a surprise with this film. Emanuel Boeck is a writer-director from Germany who came to Miami to make a movie about Cuban rafters. He chose five of Venezuela's top actors as his cast. The dialogue is in English. Got that? Inspired by Alfred Hitchcock's The Lifeboat, Boeck's The Raft (La Balsa) tells the tale of four Cubans who flee their country on (you guessed it) a raft. Everything is going along swimmingly for them until they rescue a drowning man (from another raft, we presume). The ingrate proceeds to menace them, making them regret ever having left Cuba because now they really have no escape. The film premieres tonight and tomorrow at 8:30 at the Colony Theater (1040 Lincoln Rd., Miami Beach). Tickets cost ten dollars. Call 232-6636. (NK)  

Asian Arts Festival: Bored with the same old arts festivals? Well, this one's different. Today and tomorrow from 10:00 a.m. to 6:00 p.m. the Fruit and Spice Park (24801 SW 187th Ave., Homestead) hosts this celebration of Asian culture. Stroll around the great outdoors and enjoy martial arts demonstrations, folk music, performances by dancers, traditional cuisine, arts and crafts, and of course, plants and fruit. Admission is five dollars. Call 247-5727. (NK)

Doral-Ryder Open: See Thursday.
Miami International Orchid Show: See Friday.
Winter Party Weekend: See Friday.

sunday
march 8
Puffy No Way Out Tour: It's always a touchy situation when someone acts as if he's capitalizing on a friend's death. The controversy over whether Sean "Puffy" Combs (a.k.a. Puff Daddy) really cared about his buddy Notorious B.I.G. or is just milking money from the hype about his murder will probably follow Combs to his grave. Either way, his tribute to Biggie, "I'll Be Missing You" (with an eerie borrow from the obsessive "Every Breath You Take," by the Police) was one of the biggest hits of '97, rocketing the multi-Grammy Award-winning Puff Daddy to superstardom after Biggie's demise. But if you're sick of Puff Daddy's music and the hoopla surrounding him, there are plenty more acts and tunes at the Miami Arena (721 NW First Ave.) tonight as Dru Hill, Busta Rhymes, Lil' Kim, Mase, Lox, and a whole lot more have their say. Showtime is 7:00 p.m. Tickets cost $36.75 and $42.75. Call 530-4400. (LB)

Calle Ocho: If your idea of fun is wall-to-wall people (most of them sweating), music on every block, and food at every corner, get yourself down to Little Havana this afternoon for the world's largest street party, Calle Ocho. Starting at 11:00 a.m. and going until who knows when, this event, sponsored by the Kiwanis of Little Havana, stretches 23 blocks down SW Eighth Street (from 4th to 27th avenues) and packs in more than a million people. Guzzle some cafe cubano and conga along as you listen to musical acts such as Olga Tanon, Orquesta America, Hector Tricoche, Celia Cruz, and many others. Colorfully garbed folkloric groups from Latin America will perform native dances. Clowns and face painters will keep the kiddies amused. And scores of food vendors will offer chow from all over the globe. Admission is free. Call 644-8888. (NK)

Roni Size Reprazent: With the Winter Music Conference in town, imagine South Beach as one big slab of vinyl and the hundreds of performers as its various grooves. Tonight at the Cameo Theatre (1445 Washington Ave., Miami Beach) the groove definitely goes deep: Roni Size Reprazent is in the house, and represent they do. As a pioneer of drum and bass, Size and his band have taken what was an obscure musical concept in the early Nineties and cultivated it into their latest effort, the double CD New Forms, which beat out artists such as Prodigy, Chemical Brothers, and the Spice Girls to win England's Mercury Music Prize. They're joined by Tampa's Rabbit in the Moon, featuring South Florida's reggae man Kevens, whose chats will surely raise the event to another level of consciousness. Also on the bill are the X-ecutioners, Invisibl Skratch Piklz, and about fifteen DJs working on eight turntables. Showtime is 9:00 p.m. Tickets range from $15 to $20. Call 532-0922. (LB)

Doral-Ryder Open: See Thursday.
Miami International Orchid Show: See Friday.
Winter Party Weekend: See Friday.
Winter Music Conference: See Saturday.
The Raft: See Saturday.
Asian Arts Festival: See Saturday.

monday
march 9
Generations: The gallery formerly known as Photogroup has become the Florida Center for Photography at Borders Gallery (4031 Laguna St., Coral Gables). Inaugurating its new home with more than just pretty pictures, the gallery hosts the exhibition "Generations," which includes stunning vintage photographs of pre-1959 Cuba by Roberto Machado, arresting hand-colored prints by Silvia Lazama, and touching poems from Richard Blanco's City of a Hundred Fires. The exhibition runs through April 24. Call 444-7122 for hours. (NK)

Winter Music Conference: See Saturday.

tuesday
march 10
Chant and Beyond IV: A 900-year-old nun. What's so great about that? Well, Hildegard von Bingen was the first singing nun, or make that composing nun. Born in 1098 to a noble family, Hildegard spent a lot of time in monastic communities. In 1147 she broke away and founded her own convent along with eighteen nuns and her trusty secretary, a monk named Volmar. Why should you care? While Hildegard was rebelling, she was also writing books about history, medicine, and mysticism (Volmar was great at taking dictation) and having a series of apocalyptic and earthy visions, which inspired her to compose poetry that she set to music. Forget the droning of the recently trendy chanting monks; Hildegard's music is breathtaking -- more daring and definitely more elaborate. Tonight Florida International University's School of Music celebrates Hildegard's birthday with a choral concert of her music and other sacred works by women composers throughout the ages. Admission is five dollars. Showtime is 8:00 p.m. at the Werthheim Performing Arts Center (11200 SW Eighth St.). Call 348-3359. (NK)  

Winter Music Conference: See Saturday.
Generations: See Monday.

wednesday
march 11
Stand Up and Cheer: Who better to lead the country out of the Depression than tiny Shirley Temple? In this 1934 film by director Hamilton McFadden, the irrepressible moppet is named Secretary of Amusement by the president. (Don't even think of making a Monica Lewinsky joke here.) After a lot of Shirley's high-pitched musical numbers, the country is uplifted. Too bad our own leader can't tap-dance his way out of a crisis. Presented in conjunction with the Depression-theme exhibition "Public Works," the comedy screens tonight at 7:00 at the Wolfsonian-FIU (1001 Washington Ave., Miami Beach). Admission is three dollars. Call 535-2622. (NK)

Winter Music Conference: See Saturday.
Generations: See Monday.


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