Bang & Shake

Miami's hardest-working MC, Garcia, has never made any bones about the fact that he loves porn. His promo photos are often full of booty-licious, scantily clad women (just look at the background on his MySpace page), and his last album, Life Unscripted, featured a track whose refrain went, "I wanna fuck you like a porno slutttttt...." (It was tongue-in-cheek enough, but still, old-wave feminists beware).

Lucky for him he lives here. For all our high-falutin' art fairs and international DJ conferences, one of the 305's biggest exports is Internet smut. If you grew up here, it's just a matter of time before you hear about somebody you went to high school with showing up in a scene for one of the various Reality Kings or Bangbros sites.

Miami's just a porny kind of town, and Exxxotica, which starts this Friday, is everybody's excuse to let their freak flag fly a little higher. So it's appropriate that Garcia's hosting's Exxxotica celebration party this Thursday at Shake, the party that's about celebrating all things Miami, bro.

As host, Garcia will probably drop a few rhymes -- dude's allergic to not performing. Other entertainment will come from trying to ogle the adult actresses scheduled to appear (check the flyer), and the very classy weekly Colt 45 quart-chugging contest. Ladies get in free all night, with a free drink to boot, and for everybody there are drink specials from 10 p.m. to midnight.
Thu., May 7, 2009

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