601 Biscayne Blvd.
Miami, FL 33132
305-960-8500
Admit it: You think you can coach the Miami Heat. After all, how hard can it be? Three of the greatest players in the NBA suit up for the team every night. All you really need to do is kick back, grab a beer, and turn 'em loose so they can do that thing where they blast everyone else in the league into a fine powder. But three über-talented players means three massive egos. It also means keeping them happy, because there are only so many shots to be had. Then there are the role-players — the guys who think they're here doing the Big Three a favor when it's the other way around. You're also gonna want to get these guys to play defense every night, which isn't easy because all they want to do is fly around the court and slam-dunk the ball in everybody's face. This is why Erik Spoelstra is better than you for this job. Sure, the team loses every now and then (even Jordan's Bulls lost games), and that's the perfect time for you to declare to the world that Coach Spo should go. But you're wrong. Not only does he have the Heat playing the best D in the NBA, but he also convinced LeBron that he can do more damage by playing in the low post — something no coach has ever been able to persuade King James to do. Plus, Spo makes intense chipmunk faces when he gets angry, which is a bonus. Besides, at the end of the day, the Heat is the only team in Miami that's really worth watching. Unlike other local sports teams, the Heat doesn't suck or have crazy people on the roster. But mainly, it doesn't suck. And that's in very large part thanks to Erik Spoelstra and his intense-chipmunk-face-having, ego-wranglin' ways.
SPO 1....Haters None Lebron 1...Haters None Riley 2...Knicks None (since 1995...ouch...that's gotta hurt) ...Uncle Luke needs to suck on a big fat DIZNIK for hating on Spo...stick to rapping, not writing...oops, you haven't done that one in a while...no wonder you needed a career upgrade.
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