People & Places

Comments (0) Best Public Works Project - 2011

Tollbooth-free Turnpike

We don't know about you, but when we drive around Miami-Dade, we prefer to cruise in nothing but Superman Underoos — windows down, Bon Jovi blaring, higher than Charlie Sheen on the set of Hot Shots thanks to Pop Rocks and Mr. Pibb. Police might consider it "suspicious behavior," but we prefer to call it freedom of speech. So imagine our relief when we learned that the Turnpike was going electronic. Sure, we feel for the 200 or so workers who lost their jobs — particularly the 10 percent who were actually nice. Yet proponents argue the change will save money, gas, time, and lives, because drivers no longer will have to switch lanes or slam on the brakes at the last moment. But our reasons are more selfish: no more quizzical looks from tollbooth attendants, and no more interrupting our sugar-fueled renditions of "Living on a Prayer." Amen.

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Toll runner
Toll runner

The turnpike was paid for in the 1980s. Every year since has been extortion! Tear down the tolls!

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