Best Restaurant in Coconut Grove Miami 2010 - Gibraltar
Readers' Choice: Tie: George's in the Grove; Greenstreet
We've asked Joseph Cataliotti of Jersey Joe's Used Auto Emporium to help sell the attributes of the elegant Gibraltar restaurant. Take it away, Joe!Hey, yous all out there. This is Jersey Joe telling you to drive to the ritzy Grove Isle Hotel & Spa and fill your tank at the swank Gibraltar restaurant. I ain't never been to the real Gibraltar — "Travel thousands of miles to visit a fucking rock? No, thanks!" I says to my wife when she mentioned it years ago. Anyways, the food here is cooked up by a talented kid, Jeff O'Neill. He was the Donald's personal family chef, for chrissakes! He's also worked at fancy joints with foreign names, like Restaurant Daniel and Le Bernardin. But I'm sayin' you'll never taste food like here at Gibraltar — I mean, truthfully, I don't usually eat things like flash-marinated local snapper with minted mango and pink radish, or sweetwater trout with lemon-pine quinoa. I don't even like sayin' it. But the pan-roasted guinea hen with guanciale and raisin sauce, and the farro with olive oil, and the prime strip with buttermilk mashed potatoes — fuhgeddaboutit. Of course, ya gotta rob Peter to pay the bill, but that ain't no problem. Heh-heh, just kidding. Besides that big, fat steak, all main courses are $30 or under. Hell, ya hafta take the little lady out to a nice joint once in a while, don't you? The bay view from the outdoor tables here is unbelievable — romantic as hell, nothing like it anywhere in town, period. I mean, if you can't score after takin' her out to a freakin' oasis like this, maybe it's time you sat on the bench with your bat for a while, if you know what I mean. So come on over to Gibraltar and tell 'em Joe sent you. And check out Jersey Joe's Used Auto Emporium. Remember: It may rhyme with crematorium, but nobody here gets burned!