Comments (0) Best Use of Excrement - 2007

Miami Metrozoo

Metrozooç Go south until you smell it, turn west until you step in it ... oh, hell yeah. Stinky jokes, offal puns, and a heap of fun arrived at animal land this past October to January when, we shit you not, the clever hypesters at Miami Metrozoo laid waste from an assortment of critters on tables, the floor, and — well, the stuff was everywhere but in the fan. Think of it: bird turds, big-cat scat, doo-doo from the greater kudu, and maybe one damn huge steaming dollop from Dahlip, the approximately 40-year-old Asian elephant. Based on a book by Dr. Wayne Lynch called The Scoop on Poop, this 5000-square-foot traveling exhibit made perfect scents to garner youngsters' interest in animals — nothing like poop to pique the curiosity of kids. It worked. The display of fauna feculence made national news and received plenty of coverage by local TV news — for once, they literally broadcast crap. Field trips from many schools visited the stools, and attendance soared by about a third more than typical of the three-month time period. "Best turnout in five years," says a spokesman. So hold your nose and hope that The Scoop on Poop becomes as much of a tradition as Metroboo, Bear Days, Egg Safari, Ball of the Wild, Venom Week, and Feast with the Beasts. As for the last — eat up, you productive creatures. Your output is needed, so just doo it.