Email Author Rich Juzwiak

2005 Stories by Rich Juzwiak

• Mary J. Blige

  published December 22, 2005

  Mary J. Blige knows her listeners turn to her for drama, and that's a problem. Her awareness of her misery-queen status bogs down her seventh... More >>

• James F!@#$%^ Friedman

  published December 22, 2005

  DJ/promoter/ journalist James F!@#$%^ Friedman clearly knows what it is to spread himself thin — it becomes his aesthetic on his DJ mix Go... More >>

• Stealing Is the New Stealing

  published December 15, 2005

  Nuh-uh, Gwen Stefani, that is not your shit. At least, according to Madonna, it isn't. The never-hard-up-for-material girl recently told USA... More >>

• Carl Craig

  published December 15, 2005

  As though he can't contain his own music geekdom, techno legend Carl Craig interjects numerous hoots, hollers, and on-the-spot endorsements... More >>

• The Notorious B.I.G. featuring Diddy, Nelly, Jagged Edge, and Avery Storm

  published December 8, 2005

  The problem with "Nasty Girl" isn't that there are too many cooks in the kitchen — it's that they're all standing around a microwave. The... More >>

• Ashanti featuring Paul Wall and Method Man

  published December 8, 2005

  Ashanti is not a girl, not quite a diva, and getting better all the time. With virtually no melodic support — just Irv Gotti's tinny drums... More >>

• India.Arie

  published December 8, 2005

  How many times have you thought, Oh, that India.Arie — she's nothing but a bunch of hair? None? Don't tell her that; she's convinced... More >>

• T-Boz and Chilli featuring O'so Krispie

  published December 1, 2005

  What's sadder: the fact that the living two-thirds of TLC sound sass-free on their career's predeath wheeze "I Bet," or that they've fashioned a... More >>

• Twista featuring Pharrell

  published November 24, 2005

  Follow your dreams and one day you'll be rich like Twista and Pharrell, according to the pair on "Lavish," a Neptunes production that's as lovely... More >>

• Gwen Stefani

  published November 24, 2005

  It's bling love for Gwen Stefani on "Luxurious," the fifth and second-best single from Love.Angel.Music.Baby. Gwen draws parallels between... More >>

• Madonna

  published November 17, 2005

  If Madonna were half the intellectual she colors (sorry, colours) herself as, she'd be embarrassed by her own lyrics. The... More >>

• Kelley Polar

  published November 17, 2005

  The debut album from viola player and disco-dork-cum-regular-dork Kelley Polar, Love Songs of the Hanging Gardens, is a letter of... More >>

• Remy Ma featuring Swizz Beatz

  published November 10, 2005

  The first lady of Terror Squad knows that leaning back is no substitute for dancing. But she's also undemanding: Her chorus command to "Put your... More >>

• Busta Rhymes

  published November 10, 2005

  Bussa Bust has the audacity to say, "'Ey yo, Swizz, I don't think they're ready for this shit," at the beginning of his very own quiet-tech track,... More >>

• Jamie Foxx featuring Ludacris

  published October 27, 2005

  Sex is natural, sex is good, but rarely in pop music is it this fun: Jamie's sweet nothings put the funny in boning ("I know you're used to dinner... More >>

• Lisa Shaw

  published October 20, 2005

  If what defines a pop star is her ability to be consistently bigger than her songs, Lisa Shaw is the anti-diva. As forgettable as she is... More >>

• Felix Da Housecat

  published October 20, 2005

  Felix Da Housecat never met a trend he didn't want to shack up with. Thanks to its churning guitar and hi-hat clatter on the downbeat, "Tweak!"... More >>

• Boards of Canada

  published October 13, 2005

  What do you do when everyone's counting on you to rouse intelligent dance music (IDM) out of its years-long slumber? If you're the beloved... More >>

• Mary J. Blige

  published October 13, 2005

  Smart: Mary's command at the beginning of her take on Luther Vandross's "Never Too Much" — "Gimme that guitar, like the original joint"... More >>

• Toni Braxton

  published October 13, 2005

  He might not have Taye Diggs's abs, but producer Rich Harrison gives Toni Braxton exactly what she needs to get her groove back on "Take This... More >>

• Alicia Keys

  published October 13, 2005

  A jingling keyboard, courtesy of Eddie Kendricks's "Intimate Friends," is a fine thing on which to base a song; TV-as-lovespeak wordplay ("Stay... More >>

• Mariah Carey featuring Jay-Z and Young Jeezy

  published October 6, 2005

  The people's diva, Mariah Carey, will endure anything for a hit, including the deluge of grease from DJ Clue's Southern-fried "Shake It Off"... More >>

• Masters at Work

  published September 8, 2005

  The story of house music's origins is sort of The Aristocrats for the seasoned DJ set -- you know how it begins (Jack, his groove, and "Let... More >>

• Vex'd

  published August 18, 2005

  If musical styles are skyscrapers, then Degenerate is the sound of towers falling. Though it traverses the ruins of dubstep, industrial,... More >>

• Lil' Kim

  published August 18, 2005

  As brilliantly laid-back as her flow on the agitated "Shut Up," Lil' Kim won't survive the slammer by acting this soft. Over... More >>