Email Author Chris Joseph

2008 Stories by Chris Joseph

• Rooting for the Laundry

  published August 21, 2008

  Bill Parcells's Pavlovian reflex whenever one of his former players suddenly becomes available kicked up a few notches two weeks ago when the Jets... More >>

• Kicking Ass, Eating Ice Cream

  published August 14, 2008

  It’s hard to believe it’s been five years since the Marlins won the World Series at the Cubs’ expense. Yet Cubs fans continue to... More >>

• Preseason Tuna Helper

  published August 7, 2008

  Miami Dolphins fans have been waiting long to get the taste of an awful one-win 2007 season out of their mouths. And now that football guru... More >>

• Fear the Comeback Kids

  published August 7, 2008

  Thanks to the Florida Marlins’ refusal to lose and the New York Mets and Philadelphia Phillies’ refusal to take hold of the... More >>

• Never Say Die

  published July 31, 2008

  The Florida Marlins are among the major-league leaders in game-ending hits this season, with nine. They’re also among the best at... More >>

• The Best Defense Is a Good Offense, or Not

  published July 24, 2008

  The Miami FC Blues continue to claw their way up the United Soccer League standings like an army of determined spider monkeys. Spider monkeys that... More >>

• Super Rivalry

  published July 17, 2008

  If there was ever a day for the Florida Marlins to take control of the NL East, it’s Super Saturday. Mainly because the title... More >>

• Blind Fury

  published July 3, 2008

  Here’s another reason to make you feel bad about your incessant whining and ever-expanding gut: blind powerlifting. That’s right,... More >>

• Soccer, American Style

  published July 3, 2008

  The Miami FC Blues have moved up to fifth place in the United Soccer League standings, thanks mostly to some stellar defensive play, which... More >>

• Backstop Man

  published June 26, 2008

  The Florida Marlins came into last month’s draft looking for their catcher of the future. They had their eye on two young studs... More >>

• Rival Fish

  published June 19, 2008

  For some time, Major League Baseball has been trying to force-feed us an intrastate rivalry between the Florida Marlins and the Tampa... More >>

• The No-Offense Blues

  published June 12, 2008

  Miami FC Blues sit in eighth place in the United Soccer League standings. They’re 10 points behind first-place Vancouver, but only... More >>

• Everything’s Coming Up Uggla

  published June 5, 2008

  One of the main reasons for the Florida Marlins’ recent ass-kicking ways has been the out-of-his-gourd play of 28-year-old second... More >>

• For the Bad-Ass In You

  published May 29, 2008

  Jai alai is not a game for wussies. It takes onions to play a game in which your competition launches a ball at you with deadly speed, on par with... More >>

• Signature Moment

  published May 22, 2008

  There are plenty of reasons not to see the Florida Marlins play. It’s hot (no, really, it’s hot!), it’s rainy, they play in... More >>

• All Right Now

  published May 15, 2008

  The Florida Marlins’ plan to get you to the ballpark worked so gloriously last season — a league low in total attendance —... More >>

• The Soccer Blues

  published May 15, 2008

  The Miami FC Blues dropped another heartbreaker last week with a 1-0 loss to the Carolina Railhawks. The game remained deadlocked at 0-0... More >>

• If Hanley Hits a Homer, Does It Make a Sound?

  published May 8, 2008

  Entering the fifth week of the season, the Florida Marlins ranked 19th in runs scored — good enough to be tied with the Yankees and... More >>

• Miami Blues

  published May 1, 2008

  Although they play in a lower-tier soccer league and draw fewer people than a city commission meeting, the Miami FC Blues are still very much a... More >>

• Hot Fish

  published May 1, 2008

  Something is not right with the Florida Marlins. The sucking is not working, which is the only thing they’ve been good at for the past... More >>

• Mash Unit

  published April 24, 2008

  Right-fielder Jeremy Hermida had this to say about the Florida Marlins offense now that slugger Miguel Cabrera is a Detroit Tiger:... More >>

• The Not-So-Beautiful Game

  published April 17, 2008

  They call soccer the beautiful game. In most parts of the world — such as Brazil, Italy, Argentina, and England — this is true. Here in... More >>

• Mama Said Knock You Out

  published April 17, 2008

  It’s been some years since boxing has seen a puncher like Juan Urango. He’s got a no-holds-barred approach that blends discipline with... More >>

• The Final Insult

  published April 10, 2008

  Like the 1986 Celtics, 1988 Lakers, and 1997 Bulls, every now and then there comes along an NBA team that transcends greatness, brilliance, and... More >>

• Every Rose Has It's Thorn

  published April 10, 2008

  Florida Marlins President David Samson recently revealed the team has an eight-figure salary cap — for marketing. The same team that... More >>