Top Five Bachelorettes on The Bachelor

The new year means a lot of things for a lot of people: maybe loose some weight, be a better friend, have more sex, stop smoking so much weed, etc. And for all you singles out there, we're going to guess finding l-o-v-e is also on that list--maybe even above the goal to stop puffing on the green.

Look around. Never in your life have you seen so many online

dating commercials or so many people getting engaged (there is honestly a lot). And people are even looking for love reality style. The Bachelor is on once again and it looks to be maybe be the best one yet.

Brad Womack is back and even with that dumbass look he has on his face, you have to admit he is pretty hot. He is famous for dumping his final two ladies on Season 11 and going home a single bachelor. This time around, after intense therapy (AKA a good verbal assault from his mom, "Hey idiot, you're 38, get married already") he says he is ready to find his main boo. So after two weeks of one of our favorite shows under our belt, we're here to make our prediction of the top five. And if we are guessing correctly: These bitches aren't going anywhere anytime soon.

1.Ashley H
We're not going to lie here, she is kind of a weirdo. Not only is she insanely happy, but she is a dentist and aren't all dentist kind of strange in their own way? Moving on from that, in the first 15 seconds of meeting her with all her smiling, dancing around in her tube socks and then to have her arrive in a bright pink prom dress, well yeah--we can't take much more of her. But she got the first date and the first rose of episode two, so we guess Brad is a teeth man and doesn't want Ashley H. going anywhere.

2. Michelle
Yep, here is the new Vienna of The Bachelor.You know the one: pretty, but looks like she would cut you if she got the chance. Once we heard, "I'm not here to make friends," it was easy to guess she is a whore. Only whores or mean girls  say that. We see her luring Brad in with her slut magic and making it to at least the top three.

3. Madison
Madison, Oh Madison. Let us explain her in a few words: a model with an obsession with vampires. You read that right--an adult woman with a strange Twilight-like obsession. She even has her teeth shaped into fangs! Yeah, she is going to murder the whole house. And we see Brad keeping her around for that reason only--to not get killed.

4. Emily
So here is our pick: Emily! After episode two,she is officially our girl crush of the season. She is the single mom event planner for a children's hospital with a fiancé who died in a plane crash. Not to mention--she is REALLY hot. In our opinion, she has this thing in the bag.

5. Ashley S
We might be getting ahead of ourselves, but if Emily doesn't get it, this gal is our second pick for the final rose. She received the first impression rose & is a good ole Southern girl living in NYC as a nanny. Hot, can cook, and good with kids? What more could a man looking for a wife ask for? Nothing, that's what.

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