That's LeBron saying, "Nope, this championship is mine. GO GET YOUR OWN!"
That's LeBron saying, "Nope, this championship is mine. GO GET YOUR OWN!"

The Ten Best Things to Do in Miami This Weekend

In Kanye fashion, IMMA LET CHU FINISH, AMERICA, but we just won our second back-to-back NBA Championship.

So give us a minute.

If you live anywhere between Key West and Palm Beach County and have a pulse, chances are you were among the thousands of people celebrating along the streets for last night's earth-stopping victory. You may have been banging your casuelas along la calle 49; or maybe you were lighting fireworks from your backyard in North Beach; or, maybe, just maybe, you went straight to church and thanked Jesus [Shuttlesworth, perhaps] for an amazing win.

We're a classy bunch, so we won't go trash-talking the San Antonio Spurs. Lawwwwwd did they give us a good fight. Hat's off to them. But, America, yea, you... to all of you that talked all that smack about our home team: WE GIVE YOU A LeBRONUT TO THE FACE.

The Ten Best Things to Do in Miami This Weekend

Mmm, delicious.

Friday

Fete de la Musique: A festival of music, food, and drinks, and awesomeness.

Love the Everglades Movement: Seriously, guys. The Everglades is the only Everglades we've got.

A-Trak: BARBRA STREISAND!

Free Art Fridays: Not even Wade turns down free, y'all.

Saturday

Rhythm & Arts Festival: Miami is the poster child for both of these elements!

On To the Next Radio Launch: Churchill's is the obvious host for a fully nude alternative-model site launch.

NKOTB: World's most inconvenient band acronym goes to...

Thomas Gold: Complete with the Mitas Touch.

Sunday

Chino y Nacho: Pre-game with Chinese food and nachos, optional.

Neil Gaiman Book Tour for The Ocean at the End of the Lane: Make your way to Book & Books in Coral Gables. Hurry!

Follow Alex on Twitter @ARodWrites.

Follow Cultist on Facebook and Twitter @CultistMiami.

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