The Best & Worst of 2011 TV: From Kardashians to Zombies
It was a big year for television, so when facing the daunting task of compiling the best and worst, we went back into our archives. There were so many options to include. What about those Teen Moms? They were at their dramatic best, and we hate to admit how much they entertained us. Then new shows like Homeland and Up All Night filled our DVR with such joy. But as we remembered the good, we started to think about the bad. Oh and there was a lot of bad.
So, let us take you back, way back, on the journey that was The Boob Tube of 2011.Be warned: the Kardashians made both our nice and our naughty lists this year. You
will see why:
The Situation's Concussion
Tanning lotion, hair gel, cheap vodka, and the gym. Guess what we just described? Don't pretend you're too cool to know: it's the Jersey Shore. MTV did us a solid this year by removing them from within our own borders and dropping them off in Italy. Sadly, they brought them all back. And you might be wondering why season four of the Shore isn't on the worst list. It's because of the one moment made it all worth watching: Mike's concussion. While we aren't really sure there is anything in his head to harm, watching The Situation pile-drive his body into a wall all by himself really topped off our summer.
Barbra Walters Calls Out The Kardashians
There are many questions that might never get answered for you in your lifetime: Is Bigfoot real? Did Jesus exist? Is Courtney Stodden really that dumb? These, of course, are minor mysteries compared to the issue Barbara Walters addressed this year: Do the Kardashians have talent? On her yearly Most Fascinating People special on ABC, Walters interviewed everyone from Herman Cain to the boys from Modern Family. She also chatted with the Kardashian girls and gave us the definitive answer to that question when she told them -- not asked them, but flat-out told them -- "You really don't have any talent." And the most shocking part of all it? They couldn't have agreed more.
President Obama Interrupts Your Programming
Did you think you would be able to hear the words "Osama Bin Laden is dead" this year? Yeah, we didn't either. And while that statement alone was highlight for 2011, the way Barack made the announcement was truly epic. Is it just us or is the way he struts to the podium truly pimp status?
Charlie Sheen Loses It
Remember when you heard the news that Charlie Sheen was crazy? And not just his previous crazy -- like, asylum crazy. You thought to yourself, "No! That must be a rumor." No, it wasn't. And that was all made very obvious when he decided the best way to get America back on his side was sitting down with ABC to show his normal life with his two girlfriends, one of whom is a hardcore porn star. Thank you, Charlie Sheen, for many reasons. First, because you made our messed-up families look like the goddamn Brady Bunch. And secondly, because though your drug-fueled, sex-crazed meltdown was worthy of its own episode of Intervention, it was also one of the most entertaining things we have ever watched.
Dollhouse Dance Factory: Bring It! Live
TicketsSat., Jul. 1, 8:00pm
TicketsSat., Jul. 8, 8:30pm
You're a Good Man Charlie Brown: Young Professionals
TicketsSat., Jul. 15, 2:00pm
Big Band Concerts with the Florida Wind Symphony
TicketsSat., Jul. 15, 7:00pm
Miami Curves Week Presents: Curves & Comedy
TicketsFri., Jul. 21, 9:00pm
Walking Dead Goes From Good to Great
There's a good reason why AMC announced its renewal of The Walking Dead just two episodes into this year's season. It's because with the amount of reality shows on television, a brilliantly written show in 2011 was like a unicorn, and this zombie thriller has a big horse-like horn on its face. In a good way. Starting in 2010, Dead was critically acclaimed and received multiple award nominations. But just when you thought it couldn't get any better, it did -- the minute the Grimes and fellow survivors choose to leave Atlanta for Fort Benning.
Read on for 2011's worst TV offenders.
Think of the worst thing anyone could make you watch. For some of you, maybe it's your parents "making love." For others, maybe it's just an episode of The View. Sadly, this year, we made the mistake of tuning in for David Hasselhoff''s reality show on A&E. Listening to the Hoff is on the level of Gilbert Gottfried for us. And having to watch the worst display of fame whoredom from his two daughters was just plain horrific. Which is probably why after two episodes, the network pulled the plug. A&E, we thank you.
Kim Kardashian's Wedding
This is a no brainer for us. Think the
whole thing was a sham? Think she did it all for the money? Think Kris
Humphries looks like Shrek? Well, guess what? E! doesn't care. Kim's
Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event aired for two days in two-hour
installments. And according to Nielsen, an average of 4.4 million total
viewers watched Sunday's installment; Monday's second half delivered 4
million. But the cheesiness and ridiculousness of the program isn't why
it's on this list. It's because we watched all four hours and we are
pretty sure we lost at least 40 points in our IQ because of it.
Michael Scott Leaves The Office
We all have addictions. For some, it's chocolate; for others, crack cocaine. For us, it's The Office. Or should we say, it was The Office. Since its start in 2005, we have wanted to work at Dunder Mifflin, date Jim Halpert and vacation at Schrute Farms. But that all changed when Michael Scott, real name Steve Carell, walked off the set. Yes, we were sad to see him go and the way he did it, well, sucked. He just got on a plane and peaced out? Blah. And his replacement is Andrew Bernard? NBC, congrats, you let us down.
Sandusky's First Interview
We learned this year that there is a big difference between awkward and painful. Awkward is like watching Sarah Palin try to put an educated sentence together. Painful is like ... Well, we had no idea watching TV could cause us bodily harm till we tuned into Bob Costas' Rock Center. That Monday evening, in the wake of the child sex-abuse scandal at Penn State, he got Jerry Sandusky on the phone. You would think maybe he would take this time to clear his name on a highly watched NBC news program. Well, he didn't... at all. Take a look, but be warned, it's painful.
$#*! My Dad Says
We think it's safe to say 2011 was a great year for Twitter. Yes, it has been around for a couple of years, and if you don't have your own account by now, something's up. Even our detergent has its own handle. So when we saw that one of our favorite people to follow, @shitmydadsays, was getting its very own network show, we were psyched ... until we tuned in. From the set to the story line, basically, yawn. One thing we definitely learned from watching it: William Shatner should stick to darkly funny law shows and Priceline negotiating.
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