Talking Vaginas and Other Low Points in the History of Douche
Anybody happen to get a load of the new Summer's Eve 'Hail
to the V' advertisements for their brand of feminine hygiene products (video below)? Complete with talking vaginas with racially stereotypical voiceovers? Yikes.
Way to make the ladies hail to the V, Summer's
TicketsSat., Mar. 25, 10:00pm
TicketsSat., Mar. 25, 11:00pm
The Magic of Bill Blagg Live!
TicketsSun., Mar. 26, 2:00pm
Magique - Experience The Illusion
TicketsSun., Mar. 26, 8:00pm
Dr. Morton - New President, New Foreign Policy: Two-Month Assessment
TicketsMon., Mar. 27, 7:30pm
Offending the African
American and Hispanic communities is just another sore spot in the history of
the douche. We've compiled other low points in
douche's sad, sad history.
5. Other Inappropriate Advertisements
Believe it or not, Summer's Eve's recent foray into racial
stereotypes isn't the first time the company has found itself in hot water over
it's advertising. Last year they caught flack for a magazine advertisement masquerading as a list of 'helpful tips' on asking for a raise at work. First
and foremost was using Summer's Eve Feminine Wash followed by eating breakfast,
arriving to work on time and not letting your mean old boss bully you and your
fresh vagina out of that raise.
To be fair, Summer's Eve was courting the all
important 'Female Professional Smart Enough to Hold a Successful Job but Not
Smart Enough to Know How to Ask For a Raise, Eat Properly, or Clean Themselves'
4. The Lysol Douche
Yes, everyone's favorite slightly toxic lemon scented
disinfectant was at one time our country's most popular douching formula.
Beginning at the tail end of the roaring '20s, Lysol was proclaimed to help
'marital bliss' by preventing odors and infections. From 1930 to 1960, douching
with Lysol was the number one form of birth control in America (and people
wonder how the Baby Boom started). The American Medical Association found the
claim of Lysol douching being an effective contraceptive false, and Lysol was
castigated to household cleaning purgatory.
3. Martin Lawrence's SNL Monologue
In a rarely seen banned clip from Saturday Night Live,
Martin Lawrence decided to go off script in his 1993 monologue, instead choosing
to lament what he viewed as a failure by the women he knew to properly clean
Beyond proving that Mister Lawrence had a tenuous at best grasp on the
chemistry behind breath mints, the vulgar monologue made Lawrence persona-non-grata on SNL and forced douching to forever be linked to the Wild Hogs star.
Everyone suffered as a result of Martin's douching rant. Even that evening's
musical guests Crash Test Dummies fell off the radar after the show, certainly
a result of Lawrence's ill-thought-out rant.
2. Douche as a Pejorative
At some point in the English language's recent history, the
word 'douche' has been appropriated from hygienic product to catch-all, easy
insult. Who among us hasn't called someone a douche, be it face to face,
texted, or on the safe confines of the Internet? Arguably, the use of 'douche' as an insult is inherently
sexist and denigrates the female reproductive system as grotesque. On the other
hand, can you think of a more appropriate way to describe the cast of
1. Douching: Unhealthy?
However, the most damning contributor to douching's bad PR
is the cut and dried fact that many studies have revealed that under many
circumstances, using a douche actually puts a woman's vagina at risk. Unless
prescribed by the doctor, use of commercial douches may lead to vaginal
infections, Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, and premature delivery.
So no matter
how much their advertising may speak to your particular ethnic background, just
say no to the douche. Unless you want to bang Martin Lawrence, then you're
going to want to rush to CVS for the Summer's Eve (and some Tic-Tacs).
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