Pain & Gain Crimes Continue: Somebody Stole $75,000 Worth of Michael Bay's Sex Toys
Not pictured: All of the sex toys.
When Michael Bay and the writers of Pain & Gain adapted Pete Collins New Times feature story for the screen, they stayed mostly faithful to reality. But there was one thing Bay just had to have in his foray into dark comedy.
Dildos. Lots and lots of dildos.
So he filled his version of the warehouse where the Sun Gym Gang tortured its victims -- which in reality was just a run-of-the-mill storage space -- with jiggly, neon-colored sex toys of all sorts. $75,000 worth of them, to be precise.
And now they're almost all missing.
Sarge: The Chanukah Chutzpah Tour... "Kiss My Mezuzah"
TicketsFri., Jan. 27, 8:00pm
Fundarte Presents: Chiflón By Chile's Silencio Blanco Theatre Company
TicketsFri., Jan. 27, 8:30pm
JTF's Friday Night Live
TicketsFri., Jan. 27, 9:00pm
TicketsFri., Jan. 27, 10:00pm
TicketsFri., Jan. 27, 11:00pm
The sex toys are clearly intended to create laughs; at one point, a character dildo-whips his victim across the face, as if it were a pistol. But in a new interview, Bay tells The Daily Beast that the off-camera moments were just as entertaining.
" I could have filmed the crew coming in that day because they'd stop and see these things--anatomically correct vajayjays and this butt (everyone would touch the butt because it felt real)--and it was hysterical," he says.
Turns out, he should have filmed the crew, because bit by bit, the pervy gear vanished.
"We were going to return all the sex toys to get three-quarters of our money back," Bay explains, "but they started disappearing. We were like, 'Who is taking the sex toys?'"
So be warned, Miamians: If your significant other came home from work on the Pain & Gain set with a little (or not so little) surprise for the bedroom last year, you've been getting off on Hollywood contraband.
Of course, that also means there's a chance that Mark Wahlberg touched the thing. So maybe this news will just make you enjoy it a little bit more.
Follow Ciara LaVelle on Twitter @ciaralavelle.
Get the Arts & Culture Newsletter
Find out about arts and culture events in Miami and offers you won't hear about anywhere else.