Although eating with your hands is expected at an Ethiopian restaurant, slurping soup and sucking on stone crab claws probably won't get you invited back for another dinner in Mr. Trump's penthouse. Even though we are in Miami, white shoes are still tacky when worn after Labor Day. Suzanne Willis, a graduate of the Protocol School of Palm Beach, will nitpick her way through an evening of dining and fashion tips during her interactive Oh Behave! etiquette class for adults at The Ritz-Carlton Coconut Grove, 3300 SW 27th Ave., tonight at 6:30. Lessons include pointers on surviving business functions without knocking over a glass of pinot grigio into your client's bouillabaisse and what "business casual" really means. You will have the opportunity to learn the truth about all of those forks during a four-course gourmet wine dinner. Tickets cost $148 per person, which includes dinner, tax, and gratuity. Call 305-644-4680. (LO)
D.W. Griffith, the father of filmmaking, explained his goal like this: "The task that I am trying to achieve is to make you see." Stan Brakhage lived his life by that credo. He made close to 400 strange, wonderful, experimental films, some only nine minutes long, others upward of four hours. Brakhage created compelling cinematic poetry with startling images and unexpected bursts of sound, yet the film he is most recognized for is one he was probably most dismissive of: the soft-focus, overhead, slow-motion shot of a Downy bottle softly bouncing onto a stack of fluffy towels. Enjoy a tribute to this avant-garde visionary and see Brakhage, a documentary that juxtaposes 35 years of archival footage with interviews conducted shortly before his death in 2003 tonight at 8:30, at the Miami Beach Cinematheque, 512 Espanola Way, Miami Beach. Tickets are from $8 to $10. Call 305- 673-4567 or visit www.mbcinema.com. (PEGY)
In a fortress-like home with enormous wooden doors, Enrique Chavarria lived with his three aunts. He was reclusive by nature and enjoyed solitary activities: reading, painting, and snorkeling. He was loved, but he ultimately lived a life inside a self-constructed mental shell, and his speech impediment compounded his shyness. There was a time when Chavarria couldn't manage to talk at all. He spoke most eloquently with paint on canvas, giving his protective patron, Bryna Prensky, a window into his surreal world. There, characters from Alice in Wonderland mingled with undersea creatures, and the poetry of Rimbaud and André Breton brought his nightmares and neuroses to complicated life. Explore this obscure painter's inner sanctum at "Enrique Chavarria: Journey into the Subconscious" today, starting at 10:00 a.m., at the Miami Museum of Science and Planetarium, 3280 South Miami Ave. Admission costs $10. Call 305-646-4200 or visit www.miamisci.org. (PEGY)
A kiss on the hand may still be quite continental, but honey, diamonds are more than just a girl's best friend nowadays. These chunks of carbon are also particularly beloved by the kinds of men who like a little sparkle around the ear, neck, or pinkie, googly-eyed babies who love grasping at dangling, twinkling things, and discerning grandmas with a rapper's delight worth of bling tucked away somewhere in a safe-deposit box. If you'd rather not get one of the generic, princess-cut shiny stones prominently featured at your local mall jewelry store, venture north to today's Jewelry Auction. Golden Gavel Auctioneers, Inc. will place estate, new, manufacturer overstock, and consignment jewelry on the block. Be the highest bidder and walk away with a gorgeous new best friend today, starting at noon at the War Memorial Auditorium, 800 NE Eighth St., Fort Lauderdale. Admission is free. Call 954-828-5380. (PEGY)
Sitting high above the beach, perfecting a natural bronze glow, and twirling a whistle in rhythm to the ebb and flow of azure waves and a pesky seagull's caw is the dream job of most sun-worshipping teenagers and fans of Baywatch. Only an architect would focus on the structure and design of the lifeguard tower while ignoring a curvaceous blonde in a red swimsuit running to the shore with two bouncing orange buoys. Miami Beach Life Design is an architectural competition to design lifeguard towers for Miami Beach and is part of the American Institute of Architects' Celebrate Architecture 2004 event series, a salute to the AIA Miami chapter's 75th anniversary celebration and 50th Annual Design Awards. Competition entries and winners will be on view through Tuesday, November 23, at the Miami Design Preservation League Art Deco Center, 1001 Ocean Dr., Miami Beach. Call 305-448-7488. (LO)
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Steven Tyler dons banana-yellow spandex pants and tropically vibrant flowing scarves to go to the grocery store. He also chugs fresh carrot juice by the gallon and snacks on bran muffins, or at least he did in the early Nineties when he frequented the Bread & Circus in Cambridge, Massachusetts. How else could he still be hard rockin' after 30 years? Tyler, Joe Perry, and the rest of Aerosmith surf the band documentary wake of Wilco and jump to the big screen for the premiere of You Gotta Move, a making-of-the-album film to promote their 25th release, Honkin' On Bobo. Tonight at 7:00 p.m., you will be "Livin' on the Edge" of your "Sweet Emotion" as you "Walk This Way" and "Dream On" about that "Same Old Song and Dance." UA Artists at the Falls, 9000 SW 136th St. Tickets are $12.50 in advance and $15 day of, through www.bigscreenconcerts.com. (LO)
If only cloning had been perfected by now, we could all be at the beach, reading the latest Shopaholic book and sipping piña coladas while our genetic twins toil away beneath the fluorescent lighting with nary a complaint about deadlines or paper cuts. Or, maybe you could keep the day job and work the magic of genetic splicing to guarantee a steady supply of the best dog in the world. Along came Dolly the sheep in 1996, and scientists, ethicists, and politicians have been debating the use and appropriateness of cloning ever since. University of Miami lecturer Dr. Yunqui Wang will explain how cloning works and explore the technology and future of this genetic science in Cloning: How Is It Done? What Could Happen? Admission is $10. Complimentary wine and cheese will be served for your enjoyment as you discuss the possibility of cloning your best friend's perfect husband tonight at the MIAMIntelligence Center, 2000 S. Dixie Hwy., Coconut Grove. Call 305-860-2499. (LO)