Life is a winding road, full of unexpected twists and turns. Just ask Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. If you'd told the basketball legend in the '80s that his career would have wound up as a series of AT&T commercials and reality-TV appearances just a few decades later, he probably would've said, "What? I'm sorry, man; I can't hear you from all the way up here," then easily stepped over you and continued on with his day.
But time goes on, people change, and retirement is crazy boring. And that's how Abdul-Jabbar found himself gossipping about Real Housewives with Andy Cohen on TV this week.
The Splash contestant has apparently spent his post-NBA years watching hours and hours of Bravo programming. In his recent column in the Huffington Post, "How the Real Housewives Have Made America Better," Abdul-Jabbar outs himself as a huge Housewives fan, saying the shows "offers more insight into American consciousness than most TV scripted dramas" and calling Cohen "the Andy Warhol of the 21st Century." No, really.
This, naturally, led to a spot on Cohen's Watch What Happens Live. There, Abdul-Jabbar took some time to describe his own dream team of Housewives -- not for the purposes of reality-TV entertainment but for his own imagined basketball game.
So which Miami Housewife dunks all over the rest in this bizarre thought experiment? Original gangsta Lea Black, obviously. Abdul-Jabbar told Cohen that her piercing laugh would distract the other players on the court.
Rounding out Abdul-Jabbar's team of botoxed ballers: Teresa Giudice from New Jersey, Phaedra Parks from Atlanta, Vicki Gunvalson from Orange County, and Sonya Morgan from New York.
No offense, ladies, but our money's still on the Miami Spice.
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You can watch clips from the interview in the video below.