St. Patrick's Day: It's the gnarliest Irish Catholic holiday in the liturgical calendar. Forget fasting; March 17 is all about feasting on shepherd's pie and cheap green beer till you’re projectile puking emerald-colored chunks of bad decisions.
In Coral Gables, however, the St. Patrick’s Day Celebration is less about getting twisted and becoming a huge wanker, and more about celebrating Irish culture with live entertainment, great food, "vendors galore," and "fun for kids." Ironically, it’s also seven days prior to the real St. Paddy's Day, taking place Saturday at 12 p.m. at the Fred B. Hartnett/Ponce Circle Park (2800 Ponce de Leon Boulevard, Coral Gables). Admission is free.
But don't let the family-friendly environment fool you. There will be a full, cash bar. Get loose, but don't get piss drunk. Save some liver enzymes for the inevitable shit show that'll go down on the following Saturday when you and your UM frat bros celebrate Irish culture by getting sloshed on Miracle Mile.
Be safe, y'all. And call a taxi.
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Sat., March 10, 2012