If you're a responsible adult with a nine-to-five job, you may have wasted this whole week slaving away for the man instead of guzzling Champagne and eyeing wacky art installations like the rest of this city.
Well guess what. It's Friday, meaning that for Miami's government employees, bankers, accountants, the orgy of free booze, trippy culture, and untz-untz has begun at last. Party hard, and party smart -- you only have two and a half days to do it all.
Check out our tips for where to start after the jump.
Painters Painting: The 1972 documentary collects art world greats like de Kooning and Stella for a look at the process of creating art. 8 p.m. Visit miamibeach.artbasel.com.
HOTBED: Check out talented students' film works at the NADA lobby -- or from one of the hotel's own "hot beds," if you get lucky with a hotel guest. The films are screening 24/7. Visit newartdealers.org.
Moving the Still: The Internet made animated GIFs famous. This exhibit's making them art. It's open from noon to 7 p.m. daily through December 8, but the swanky party to celebrate the moving images starts tonight at 8 p.m. Visit movingthestill.paddle8.com.
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Pulse Afterparty: It's sponsored by W Magazine and Hipstamatic. SSION is playing, and organizers promise "glitter and poppers." The dude in drag on the flyer has an ironic mustache. If you like hipsters, this is your paradise, kicking off at the Shore Club pool at 9 p.m.
Art of Basketball: If you haven't seen the exhibit yet, go early tomorrow -- then stick around to check out the red carpet featuring Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh, and other Miami Heat players and celebrities. Arrivals begin at 8 p.m. Visit publicworksdept.com.
Fountain Art Fair afterparty: Cafeina hosts the festivities, with Low Pitch Orchestra providing the soundtrack and performance artist Masci providing the aerial eye candy. Midnight to 5 a.m. Visit cafeinamiami.com.