Big Ang's Miami Monkey: What to Expect From Miami's Next Reality Show Trainwreck
When Miami Monkey opened on Ocean Drive in May, we knew it wouldn't be the last we'd see of its proprietor, Mob Wives reality TV star Big Ang. In fact, it was only the beginning. And if you're familiar with the big-mouthed and bigger-breasted Ang, you know that, well, there's a lot to see.
So naturally, the cameras have been rolling. Yesterday, Vh1 finally announced details of its newest series, starring Big Ang and lazily titled Miami Monkey, calling it "the ultimate cocktail of work and play." Yeah, that's what they said about The Catalina too.
Here's what Big Ang will be serving up on Vh1 this September:
Dance Through The Ages: Bright Lights, Big Cities
TicketsSun., May. 28, 11:00am
Magique - Experience The Illusion
TicketsSun., May. 28, 7:00pm
Israeli Dance Festival: Hope
TicketsSun., May. 28, 7:00pm
10th Annual Memorial Weekend Comedy Festival
TicketsSun., May. 28, 8:00pm
Young Contemporary Dance Theatre
TicketsSat., Jun. 3, 6:00pm
The series follows Ang as she opens and tries to bring Miami Monkey to success on South Beach, Vh1's announcement explains. "To ensure the success of Miami Monkey as the newest South Beach hotspot, Ang enlists the help of a crew of Staten Island beauties and SoBe hotties to come along for the ride." Wait, a television program starring attractive young people? How novel!
Big Ang's "bossy 'mini-me' daughter" Raquel will be working weekends at the Monkey ... and then flying back to New York every week for her full-time nine-to-five job. Girl, the tips are not gonna be that good.
While she's away, her best friend and cousin-in-law Roxanne will take over. She's -- surprise! -- another "loud-mouthed and opinionated" woman. Surely things will go smoothly, a real family love-fest with no giant arguments, backstabbing, or catfights at all.
Is this the show's star tattooed multi-hyphenate bro?
Latinas and Bros
"Miami brings the fire when three locals join the Miami Monkey crew," Vh1 predicts, including "Cristina, 27 ... a spicy, energetic, and flirty bartender." So she's fiery and spicy, huh? Ay dios mio, whatever could Vh1 be implying? Guess the show's ethnic stereotyping doesn't stop at Italians.
Speaking of stereotypes: "Nate Ryan, 26, is the ultimate multi-hyphenate. He works as a bartender-DJ- model-music producer-water sports instructor. Nate Ryan is a single ladies' man who doesn't mind that girls are lined up around the block to get their hands on his tanned and tattooed body." In other words, he's a bro.
Obviously. You can't be Big Ang without your trademark cleavage, and at least one of the other Miami Monkey employees will be flaunting a little skin, too. "Marissa, 29, is a party girl who sports the skimpiest of outfits," Vh1 explains.
Miami Monkey premieres Sunday, Sept. 8, at 10 p.m. on Vh1.
Follow Ciara LaVelle on Twitter @ciaralavelle.
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