It takes a lot to shock us. As you know, living in Miami, well, you see some things. Then you go home and watch reality television for your job, and you see some more things. Let's just say our skin is pretty damn thick.
But while watching Basketball Wives Monday evening, our jaw was on the floor for a good portion of the program. The reason? Tami Roman and the fact she is bat-shit crazy.
Also shocking: the Vh1 series has hit a new low. And that's really saying something. The entirety of last night's program focused on one of the dumbest situations we
have ever seen, and we're defining "dumb" by reality TV standards, which is the dumbest kind of dumb.
We will never get those 60 minutes back.
Last week, we left off moments into a familiar scene: Miss Roman verbally assaulting Kesha Nichols once again. Having guzzled some liquid courage from the bar, Tami needed Kesha to hear (once again) that she hates every inch of her tiny body and that until she hears the words "I'm" and "sorry," bitch isn't getting her purse back. (Mental note: don't leave your personal belongings in the presence of Tami Roman.)
As the other ladies watched this tussle go down, they were, for once in their lives, speechless. To see Evelyn Lozada have nothing to say is almost like seeing a unicorn poop diamonds. It's impossible. Then, to add more strange the stew, the ladies start defending Kesha. Maybe it was because of all the nonsensical "reasons" Tami started to list to explain how and why she won't be giving the purse back. Obviously, all that anger management she has been doing is totally working out.
When the women arrive back to their hotel after the Kesha vs. Tami showdown,
they break into Kenya Bells' room to continue down the road to destroying everyone's self-esteem. Because that's what rational, grown women do. Ok, moving on.
Have you ever seen an episode of Intervention? Where the full-blown booze found constantly speak to her friends and family in a manner that resembles someone speaking in tongues? Yeah, that was Tami in Tahiti.
Back at the resort, the girls somehow talk Kesha into apologizing to get her belongings back. Tami insanely responds that Kesha should actually be thanking her, because
she left her bag behind. Um, do you mean when Kesha stepped aside
because she was about to be popped in the mouth?
Slowly but surely, the scene turned from an episode of Intervention to merely a sad display of a mean girl doing her best to break down someone's sanity.
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In Tami's defense, she watched the show with the rest of us and offered Kesha a public apology on Facebook last night, saying, "I am NOT a bully as depicted on the show, but I did make poor decisions in handling my differences with my cast mate. I sincerely apologize to all of us, as well as to my castmate who was on the receiving end of my wrath." But how much can a belated Facebook status count, really?
We watch Basketball Wives because of the drama, its true. But if episode 13 is an example of what we can expect from future episodes or even season five, we are going to have to ask you to hide the razors. Last night's episode sunk to lows we've only seen previously in Kenya's wardrobe: beyond dreadful.
Please Vh1, get your shit together.