By Nate "Igor" Smith
By Abel Folgar
By Kat Bein
By Jacob Katel
By Karli Evans
By Jose D. Duran
By Pablo Chacon Alvarez
Imagine standing behind the decks at a massive concert, a solitary king ruling over an undulating sea of adoring fans.
Must be hard not to feel a surge of absolute power and control. After all, you're the DJ, the person in charge of sonically and spiritually guiding thousands of people toward BPM enlightenment and securing a place in their hearts, at least until the next megafest.
There are tons of perks that come with the worldwide adoration of EDM superstardom. But thanks to social media, we're all getting a sneak peek at our favorite jocks' nonstop jet-setting party lifestyle. And sometimes, the results can be a bit, well, douchey.
1400 N. Miami Ave.
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Category: Performing Arts Venues
Region: Central Dade
Here's a list of DJs who might want to keep their publicists on speed dial.
Calvin Harris. This Scottish poster boy for beat-funded bacchanalia has become an absolute pro at archiving his splendorous existence with the perfect Instagram filter. Replete with celebrity hobnobbing, yacht-related selfies, and what appears to be a love affair with the step-and-repeat, Harris' social media feed proves he is clearly no stranger to life's luxuries. And thanks to the 15 seconds of fury that is Instagram video, Harris is perfecting the art of the so-called moving selfie.
Wolfgang Gartner. Excluding folks fortunate enough to cruise around in a private jet (looking at you, Zedd), is anyone really safe from the vortex of anguish that is airplane travel? L.A.'s prince of house, Wolfgang Gartner, certainly isn't, and he wants everyone to know about it. A quick glance at his Twitter account and you're bound to see a flurry of first-class grievances amid a sea of unfiltered DJ musings and dick jokes.
Afrojack. This Dutch jock is said to be a nice guy, but he certainly seems to be feeling himself. His most embarrassing antics have included dating Paris Hilton, teaching Paris Hilton to DJ, producing music for Paris Hilton, and destroying $250,000 sports cars for fun. Last year, less than an hour after getting a new Ferrari 458 Italia, he smashed it up and later took to humble-bragging about the wreckage on social media. "Have to take rear wheel drive lessons," he tweeted, "458 is a monster compared to the R8!" He almost redeemed himself by dumping Hilton during an interview, saying they're just close friends. Either way, it's more than enough to give the guy a big head.
Diplo. He is EDM's premier party boy. And he has successfully encouraged women everywhere to "express themselves," which basically means flooding his Twitter feed with half-naked pictures and videos of themselves doing his signature ass-out girl twerk. Now, we suppose if you constantly have to fend off gorgeous women and pore over multimillion dollar branding opportunities, there's no indignity in telling the New York Times: "I'm pretty and I'm in BlackBerry ads."
Deadmau5. Perhaps this rodent-guised superstar was looking to absolve himself of his party sins when he called out the world of EDM as a circle jerk of no-talent button-pushers. Or when he trashed Ultra Music Festival for overcharging fans, only to headline the next year. Or when he derided South Beach club culture and its narcissistic iPhone-addicted scenesters during a set at Mansion Miami last month. But even if he's often been an insufferably (and erratically) whiny Twitter bitcher, we've got to give the Mau5 man props for finally taking action against the hyper-commercialization of electronic dance music by giving the real Miami fans a free concert this week.
Bow down before the big, fat Mau5head! You know, before he does something dumb again.