By David Villano
By Jose D. Duran
By Michael E. Miller
By Allie Conti
By Kyle Swenson
By Luther Campbell
By Frank Owen
By Allie Conti
Last week, 30 Rock ended its seven-season run on NBC as one of America's most acclaimed, best-loved, and least watched sitcoms.
Anyone who did tune in, though, probably picked up on the show's regular Florida references. Honestly, there have been shows set in Florida that didn't mention our penis of a state as often. With lead character Jenna Maroney conceived in a Tampa bathroom stall, and boss Jack Donaghy's mother, Colleen, being one of our state's numerous ornery retirees, the show never missed a chance to rag on Florida.
In honor of 30 Rock, let's look back at some of our favorite Sunshine State smackdowns:
1. Jack, explaining why he's going on a trip to Miami: "Ass... and the burgeoning art scene."
2. Jack, on Floridians: "Have you ever been to Florida? It's basically a prison population. It's America's Australia."
3. Colleen, on dating a married man: "It's Florida, Jack! It's like it never stopped being the '70s down there. And a guy like Paul, who can drive at night, you just don't say no to that."
4. Head writer Pete trying to persuade Liz to take the show to Miami for a week: "Think about it, Liz: Florida! I can rent a convertible for a week. You can complain about the heat with elderly people."
5. Jenna's mother, Verna, teaching Jack about Florida's dress code: "So wear something nice, like a pair of them white jeans and a Dan Marino jersey or something."
6. Jack's recently deceased mother's lesbian partner explaining Florida hospitality: "Where are my manners? Let me boil you up a pot of hot Gatorade."
7. Jack's attempt to use the local 911 system: "Thank you for calling Florida's emergency services. If this is regarding an anaconda in a crawl space, press 1. If a sinkhole full of Indian bones has appeared in your living room, press 2. If you want to know why JAG wasn't on this week, press 3."
8. Lead comic Tracy Jordan's take on South Florida: "Now, the Cubans in the South — very conservative. I've had a lot of expensive cigars put out on me in Miami comedy clubs."
9. Jack's take on Central Florida: "But Central Florida is dominated by Jewish retirees, serial killers, and secretly gay Disney princes."
10. His thoughts on North Florida: "It's a combination of elderly shut-ins, beach bums, bus passengers who ran out of money, swamp people, and pirates."
11. Jenna, on what she learned at Florida's finest acting academy: "You can't play prom queens and murdered runaways forever. But those were my majors at the Royal Tampa Academy of Dramatic Tricks."
12. On the sad fate of that school: "You think I'm stupid just because my college got tipped over by those Miami Heat fans."