Top 15 Memorial Day Weekend Parties in Miami

The Beach is about to get flooded, son.

At this very moment, there are 250,000 rappers, DJs, celebs, porn stars, strippers, and regular people packing the Hummer full of champagne, cash money, and 12 changes of clothes. They're making last-minute adjustments to the party plan. And soon they'll be cruising across the causeway for Memorial Day weekend.

Meanwhile, the Miami Beach Police Department, City Manager Jorge Gonzalez, and the Unity Coalition's anti-Urban Beach Week activists are frantically prepping for this human tsunami by organizing an onslaught of cops, DUI stops, and other emergency security measures.

Have a supa holiday with the supa thug, Young Jeezy.
Hannibal Matthews
Have a supa holiday with the supa thug, Young Jeezy.

Location Info

Map

SoBe Live

1203 Washington Ave.
Miami Beach, FL 33139

Category: Bars and Clubs

Region: South Beach

Cameo

1445 Washington Ave.
Miami Beach, FL 33139

Category: Bars and Clubs

Region: South Beach

Club Play

1045 5th St.
Miami Beach, FL 33139

Category: Bars and Clubs

Region: South Beach

King of Diamonds

17800 NE 5th Ave.
Miami, FL 33162

Category: Adult

Region: Aventura/North Miami Beach

The Catalina Hotel & Beach Club

1732 Collins Ave.
Miami Beach, FL 33139

Category: Hotels and Resorts

Region: South Beach

Ice Palace

71 NW 14th St.
Miami, FL 33136

Category: Bars and Clubs

Region: Downtown/Overtown

Mansion

1235 Washington Ave.
Miami Beach, FL 33119

Category: Dance Clubs

Region:

Terrace Bar and Cigar Lounge

448 Ocean Drive
Miami Beach, FL 33139

Category: Bars and Clubs

Region: South Beach

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But we at New Times just wanna nonviolently wild out. So let's all chill and keep the peace. There are way too many holiday throwdowns to even bother beefing. And as proof, here are the 15 best parties for Memorial Day weekend 2012 in Miami.

Jeremih and Roxy Reynolds. 11 p.m. Thursday, May 24, at SoBe Live, 1203 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-725-3353; sobelivesouthbeach.com. Tickets cost $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Kick off Memorial Day weekend with Chi-Town fellatio fanatic Jeremih, porn pro Roxy Reynolds, and a lil' foreplay. As the J-Man likes to say, "Lick it, lick it, lick it."

DJ Khaled. With French Montana. 10 p.m.,Thursday, May 24, at Cameo, 1445 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-532-2667; cameomiami.com. Tickets cost $30 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Big homie's got a billion jobs. He's a Def Jam exec, the CEO of We the Best enterprises, a YMCMB superproducer, 99 Jamz's top jock, and an all-star professional party starter. So he works, like, 27-hour days. And this Thursday, he'll make Cameo his office.

YMCMB. Hosted by Birdman. 10 p.m. Thursday, May 24, at Club Play, 1045 Fifth St., Miami Beach; 305-532-4340; clubplaysouthbeach.com. Tickets cost $40 to $120 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. What goes down when Mr. Brian "Birdman" Williams (AKA Baby, Stunna, Lil Wayne's Daddy) and the rest of the Young Money Cash Money crew waste a weeknight on South Beach? Well, according to the official YMCMB corporate handbook, approximately $1 billion, 333 bottles of GT vodka, and 69 premium hos.

Young Jeezy. 10 p.m. Friday, May 25, at King of Diamonds, 17800 NE Fifth Ave., North Miami Beach; 305-999-9500; kingofdiamondmiami.com. Tickets cost $60 to $120 plus fees via fla.vor.us. Ages 21 and up. We were warned. "Can't you niggas tell?" Jeezy shrieked. "I'm just looking for a supa-freak." And now this Southern spitter says he's "supa-geeked," cruising toward KOD in his "supa-coupe" with a suitcase full of "kush and Cîroc" and "100 stacks" looking for a supa-stripper with that "wet-wet supa-leak."

Ace Hood. With Juelz Santana, plus DJs Springer, Griot, and Nasty. 10 p.m. Friday, May 25, at Cameo, 1445 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-532-2667; cameomiami.com. Admission is free before midnight. Ages 21 and up. Sometimes you wanna blow that money fast. Other times you gotta save. As Broward County native and DJ Khaled protégé Ace Hood astutely points out, "Mama need a house, baby need some shoes." And that's exactly why he, Juelz Santana, and the Best of the Best fest are hooking all y'all up with free admission to Cameo this Friday.

French Montana's Shot Caller Daytime Party. With DJs Boof and Epps, and Jay Rells. Noon Saturday, May 26, at the Catalina Hotel & Beach Club, 1732 Collins Ave., Miami Beach; 305-674-1160; catalinahotel.com. Three-day passes to Miami Madness parties cost $125 plus fees via miamimadnessweekend.com. Ages 21 and up. As the founder of Cocaine City Records and a recent signee to Diddy's Bad Boy Records, Morocco-born, South Bronx-bred rapper French Montana is a certified shot caller. His advice for a successful Memorial Day weekend: "Last sleep, first up, like a dope dealer."

Gucci Mane. With DJs Q45 and Nasty. 10 p.m. Saturday, May 26, at SoBe Live, 1203 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-725-3353; sobelivesouthbeach.com. Tickets cost $30 to $1,500 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ladies drink free till midnight. Ages 21 and up. Yeah, son, Gucci Mane is insane. He's a big fan of betting on stripper fistfights. He's gone to jail for shoving a woman out of his speeding SUV. He's even got an ice-cream cone and red lightning bolts tattooed on his face. So, uh, who knows what this party animal's got planned for Saturday. Our only hint comes via Gucci's Twitter: "Memorial Day Weekend will never be the same! Burrrr!"

Trey Songz. With Mavado, Stevie J, and Top Feelin, hosted by Miss Kimmy, Felisha Monet, and Papa Keith. 10 p.m. Saturday, May 26, at Ice Palace, 71 NW 14th St., Miami; 305-403-7850; big-time.com. Admission is free for ladies. Tickets cost $40 to $60 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Even though smooth crooner Trey Songz likes to ohh-ohh about the facial expressions people make during sexual intercourse and orgasms that feel like a "Heart Attack," he's really just a hopeless romantic with a head full of deep thoughts. And this holiday rendezvous is "Reserved for the Mature & the Privileged." Let's try to love and respect each other, people.

Birdman and Friends. With DJs Affect and Mummy. 10 p.m. Saturday, May 26, at Cameo, 1445 Washington Ave., Miami Beach; 305-532-2667; cameomiami.com. Tickets cost $50 plus fees via wantickets.com. Ages 21 and up. Whenever a rapper releases a new track loaded with all kinds of nasty language, he's gotta do a cleaned-up, duplicate version for MTV and corporate radio. Similarly, whenever a rapper like Birdman throws a raunchy, late-night Memorial Day party at a strip club like King of Diamonds, he's gotta give the timid party people an option without the bare booties and dirty dolla-dolla bills.

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4 comments
Jabari Jones
Jabari Jones

THICK THURSDAYS PRESENTS "BOOTYLICIOUS BIG GURLZ" 5-24-12

A One Of A Kind Ladies/Fantasy Nite! 4 The Big,Thick & Sexxy Ladies & The Real Men! Who Adore Them!

Jabari Jones
Jabari Jones

THICK THURSDAYS PRESENTS "BOOTYLICIOUS BIG GURLZ" 5-24-12 thickthursdays.netA One Of A Kind Ladies/Fantasy Nite! 4 The Big,Thick & Sexxy Ladies & The Real Men! Who Adore Them!

Jabari Jones
Jabari Jones

THE BIG SEXY GURLZ PARTY @ WWW.THICKTHURSDAYS.NET AKA 1060 NE 79ST CWSY >>> MAY 18th.. 2 night!!!!

 
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