Herman Cain: Our next vice president

Luther Campbell, the man whose booty-shaking madness made the U.S. Supreme Court stand up for free speech, gets as nasty as he wants to be for Miami New Times. This week, Luke assesses the African-American frontrunner for the Republican presidential nomination.

Herman Cain's emergence as the GOP candidate who could take on Barack Obama in 2012 lets people know a conservative African-American can succeed on the national stage. You have the hip-hop generation standing behind Obama, and Cain is the man for those who believe they are members of high society and get along just dandy with the 1 percent of white Americans who control the country's wealth.

Have a conversation with a bourgie, and he or she will trash lower- and middle-class African-Americans the same way a Ku Klux Klan member would. They are usually the only black person among white conservatives in group photos. Cain sees himself as an elitist, so he can relate to the white right-wingers, and they can relate to him.

But conservatives who constantly rail against gay marriage and abortion always have shit in their closet that is totally the opposite of the values they preach. Cain is no different. He made the crazy claim that the founder of Planned Parenthood wanted to prevent "black babies from being born" and that the organization built 75 percent of its clinics in black communities — two statements that have been widely dismissed as false. When he was recently on Meet the Press, Cain also said he would seek a constitutional ban on same-sex marriages.

For the past two weeks, Cain has had to answer questions about allegedly sexually harassing three National Restaurant Association female employees who worked for him when he headed the organization 12 years ago. The women accused him of conversations "filled with innuendo or personal questions of a sexually suggestive nature." The New York Times reported that both accusers received cash payments — one got $35,000 — after signing nondisclosure agreements. Maybe Cain asked the ladies if they enjoyed being "face down, ass up."

Cain says stories about the scandal are racially motivated. Right-wing loudmouths such as Ann Coulter and Donald Trump are also playing the race card on Cain's behalf. Questioning the legitimacy of Obama's citizenship is pretty damn racist too, but that didn't stop Coulter and Trump from doing it. Their hypocrisy knows no bounds.

This black man is in the race to do one thing: siphon independent voters away from Obama. Don't be surprised to see Cain offered VP if he fails to get the presidential nomination.

 
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33 comments
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Jessica
Jessica

I am a 26 years old girl, down to earth and cute but still single ... I wanna find my lover who can give me a real love,so I joined in the seekcasual.COM,it's the best club for man and woman finding their intimate encounters. Well, you do not have to be lonely , you can meet the Mr. or Miss. Right there.

George
George

Herman Cain, the first ex-candidate to ever quote Pokemon in a speech(!), shouldn't be elected dogcatcher. That he would even be considered by some only goes to show the lack of depth in the electorate. Then again,I wonder how the GOP managed to avoid Pee Wee Herman this year; he would have been top-3 material, easy!

Julnj2
Julnj2

So are you saying hes a classic, "uncle tom", Luther? LOL

Pstern
Pstern

The GOP will NEVER support a black man for President or VP, much as it will NEVER support a libertarian like Ron Paul. So, dream on brother!

Gary Holbrook
Gary Holbrook

Biden has been a total disappointment to me. I had no idea he had such an inflated ego.

Now I know what is a real ego thanks to Cain. He is going do step in some deep do do he can't scrape off the bottom of his show while offering a blind eye to the accusations on sexual harrasement that are not going to go away.

At best, he will end up putting pepporni on bad pizza dough.

saul
saul

I personally never ever liked you,but you did say the truth in your article.

Pukesgospelisalie
Pukesgospelisalie

You stupid saucerlipped porch monkey, someone posted they lost 10 IQ points reading the first paragraph. How they were able to read that long into your POS article is beyond any comprehention. Four words in I knew what you wrote was another ramble filled poor excuse for JOURNALISM by a buffoon playing the race card. Fuck you Puke.

Gnarly
Gnarly

I know some crackers who are beside themselves over the possibility of having to choose between two African Americans. Still, Cain seems much more grounded than someone who believes a convicted con man got golden tablets from an angel then translated them with a scrying stone.

Bbed
Bbed

Luke... I'm your father. Anyone else see the resemblance?

Alejandro
Alejandro

your an idiot, all i had to do was read the first paragraph. POP THAT P@$%Y BABY POP POP

Larry Bee
Larry Bee

Only a fool or an idiot would dare mention Mr. Cain and Mr. Cosby in the same sentence and imply that they have similarities. Shame on you.

claudia
claudia

The tea-baggers like Cain because he isn't "uppity"...he wouldn't split the black vote. Black people aren't dumb to support someone just because they're black, if that were the case then where the fuck is Alan Keyes?? This guys a joke, just like his pizza chain.

smash44
smash44

Luke's your typical black idiot. He despises Cain because Cain isn't "black" enough for him. In other words, Cain has made something of himself without the taxpayer footing the bill like obama and every other black racist politician.

Run-of-the-Mill Welfare sucking blacks don't like Cain because he won't keep them in Democratic slavery. Blacks are terrified of him, just like they are of Bill Cosby, because they expect their race to improve and support themselves. Blacks would rather continue to suckle the taxpayers teat and remain in poverty, desperation and crime.

f b
f b

right because black people are mindless zombies who follow black candidates around no matter what. Before Michael Steele was head of the RNC he got his ass handed to him in a Maryland senate race.. In Maryland about 40 percent of all democrats are black. So, so much for your "logic". People follow Ideology not race. If that was the case Marco Rubio wouldnt had won the vote in Northern FLorida which he did pretty handedly. He did better in northern Florida than in south florida.

Alfinisti
Alfinisti

Succinct and to the point, sort of. Cain is a joke, I have tried but I can't take him seriously and can barely follow his illogical, incomprehensible gibberish. His attraction to the GOP base remains a mystery, fascinating study in group dynamics however, it sheds light on other inexplicable group dynamic behavior in history where the group engaged in behavior directly in opposition to their interests in support and enabling unqualified leaders. I especially enjoyed his latest proclamation that he could not have engaged in predatory sexual behavior before his wife can't conceive of it or beleive in it. I was reminded of the mother explaining to the court how her boy is a good kid just misunderstood and that he couldn't possibly have been responsible for those 12 dismembered women buried in the back yard. Fascinating.

Carfunkle
Carfunkle

Fu*k wit 'em, Luke. The saddest part about the Herman Cain harrassment scandal is that it has totally taken away attention from how utterly incompentent this guy is to be in politics. His 9-9-9 plan makes for a good bumper sticker but horrible policy. He doesn't know if he'd negotiate a prisoner release with terrorists. The guy is an empty suit. Great with the one liners. Totally lacking in substance. The Kim Kardasian of politics. He looks good but but ain't nothin' to it.

disgusting111
disgusting111

Wow. What an article. So much wisdom and insight.

You are preying upon the African American community here.

There's so much jumbled up falsehoods here, I don't have time to begin to talk about it.

Suffice it to say, anyone who reads this must have their brain turned on to be sure to not get sucked into the rhetoric.

Caeser_Palache
Caeser_Palache

Black people aren't dumb to support someone just because they're black, - That's a bold statement.

f b
f b

democratic slavery? then you wonder why african americans never support republicans. it's like the chicken and the EGG...but the chicken is wearing a white hood

Caeser_Palache
Caeser_Palache

You think, maybe, most of the voters were afraid Steele would make them work? You know, cut some of their benfits? You know, stop people from making a career out of entitlement programs and riding on the backs of tax-payers?

f b
f b

actually that is the brilliant part about it... would you rather be labeled as a Sarah Palin or a Perv? In politics you take Perv any day. You can always blanket deny everything. Cain's biggest mistake was that he opened his mouth. He had the best card... the confidentiality agreement.. he didnt use it... so he digged his own grave

Fernie B
Fernie B

impartiality of the article aside, anybody who thinks Cain is a viable candidate is already down 2 strikes in any political argument. Blacks support democrats because the policies of the democrats are slightly better for them. Just like billionaires support republicans for that reason. And the same reason evangelicals support republicans and why lawyers support democrats. You want the black vote to go to republicans? tell people in the republican party to tone down the racist shit and actually listen to what the black community want. You want women to support republicans? stop telling them what to do with their bodies. You want latinos to support republicans? stop the 1936-esque xenophobia and so on and so on.

f b
f b

and what makes your reply?

f b
f b

Good luck winning the black vote with those arguments...you are awesome at rallying the republican batshit insane base... horrible at recruiting indies and rational republicans .... stay out of politics... you wouldnt make a cent in it and you sound like an amateur. You realize the republican party has probably lost the states of North Carolina & Georgia (at the presidential level) forever right? and in 10 years by 2020 they will lose Texas. good lucking winning an election without winning texas or california. thats 100 electoral votes right there... but that's if things continue... what will happen though is The republican party will sell you out like the democrats sold the liberal left. We might have 4 parties within yours and my lifetime. Which means amending the constitution to change the whole 270 thing... which should be laughable as smaller states will throw a hissy fit

f b
f b

or maybe is/was a total tool?

seep
seep

More lech than perv. I'm sure many women have reciprocated his advances. I'd be trying to have sex with every attractive woman that worked under me too. If I had women working under me. Which I don't. But I would if I did. Not too many guys wouldn't, I imagine. I mean, why not? You only live once, probably.

Fernie B
Fernie B

by the way i am as democrat as Teddy Kennedy. And i want cain to win the nomination.. thats how much of a joke i think he is.. bring him on...

 
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