Smash Face, Repeat

Joey “Twinkle Fingers” Hernandez is a true Miami brawler and the world junior middleweight champion. He’s also Don King’s newest knuckle scientist, he throws a left hook like a Mack truck, and this Saturday at 6 p.m., he’ll defend his belt against Mexico’s Elco “the Animal” García. Don King Presents Championship Boxing’s main event will feature Panama’s Guillermo “el Felino” Jones against Vero Beach’s ten-ton chin Mike Marrone. Boxing may be the sweet science, but blood is what we’re after. We want heavy-hammer pugilism, flesh reduced to pulp, and bodies dropping to the floor like boulders in a Colorado rock slide. We’re counting on at least ten rounds of primal battery and a late KO to win it all, or else we’ll be running from the Cuban mob faster than a cracker.
Sat., Nov. 5, 6 p.m., 2011

 
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