Jason Terry's tattoo shows he has more balls than brains

America hates the Miami Heat. That much is clear. The relationship is so bad that everything LeBron and company do — film commercials, make layups, eat pasta, wipe back to front, whatever — draws the ire of the entire nation. Case in point: Dallas Mavericks shooting guard Jason Terry gets a tattoo of the Larry O'Brien NBA Championship Trophy on his right bicep, yet somehow the Heat is blamed for early celebrations.

When Dwyane Wade left his hand in the air after swishing a three-pointer to put the Heat up by 15 in Game 2 of the finals, Terry took offense. He followed Wade toward half-court, cussing him out. When the Mavericks came back to win in the dying seconds, Terry cited Wade's celebratory gesture as inspiration.

So pardon our schadenfreude, but we hope the Heat destroys Dallas and Terry's stupid tattoo comes back to haunt him. Just in case he doesn't want a painful reminder of his shortcomings permanently inked on his arm, however, we've come up with five ways to transform the tattoo to hide his arrogance:

• Beautiful butterfly: Terry is obviously a sensitive guy. Why else would he flip out when Wade simply followed through on a sweet shot? So maybe a nice, colorful arthropod on his arm would boost his self-esteem above douchebag level. Just add some wings to the existing tat, and voila.

• Propeller plane: Despite his nickname and his own annoying airplane celebrations, Terry is not really much of a jet. Instead, his tattoo should feature an old-timey plane that's just like him: slow and prone to breaking down in the clutch.

• Ice-cream cone: Maybe Dallas's defeat will be so crushing that Terry will go off the rails in Gucci Mane fashion. If he does, he already has the rapper's ice-cream cone tattoo halfway done — just in a slightly more subtle spot.

• Jason Terry: He's tall and bald, just like the trophy. The tattoo practically inks itself. Besides, meta-tattoos are in these days. It would be an RIP to his own naiveté.

• Penis: Why not? The basic design is already there. Plus it's less embarrassing than admitting you got a trophy tattooed on your arm before you actually won it.

 
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38 comments
Jag_bite
Jag_bite

Mavs all day baby. Heat are classless who makes fun of dirk after you lose. And Terry hitting that big 3 in lebrons face game 5 priceless. Maybe Hell get a tat of that next

Hahaha
Hahaha

Michael E. Miller it goes to show you know absolutely nothing about basketball... Hmmmm how about Lebron get the propeller plane? And you talk about Terry breaking down in the clutch ha! PS I do know that this was posted after gm 2..

Phortn
Phortn

lebron sucks,... wade is a baby,... and bosh just looks like an avatar..... and he sucks too

HAHA
HAHA

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Azniza519
Azniza519

this writer is a hater! "slow and prone to breaking down in the clutch" Have you been living under a rock?

Mavs Fan!
Mavs Fan!

I guess that cough is what made Wade choke!!

Gil Hamilton
Gil Hamilton

That tattoo got a close up while he was holding the trophy. Now when is Miami gonna get rid of that dumb lebron, what a jinx, well maybe he shoulda waited till he actually did something before he annointed himself King.

Gil Hamilton
Gil Hamilton

Lol, maybe the thought of getting rid of the tattoo helped him shoot the lights out in Miami tonight.

Mavs Fan!
Mavs Fan!

Mavericks were Awesome!!! They r the champs!!

the clown
the clown

aah man LMAO i bet micheal miller is hiding somewhere in the caves of Afghanistan after tonight. Dont come out with any more articles, hibernate!

itguy
itguy

the heat is put out. superstar arrogance is far worse. good teamwork overcame ridiculous salaries. grate macs for a finals well played.

Bp_fenerr
Bp_fenerr

Ahaha nice job guys, all those ideas would be great if he didn't light the heat up!

Gold_n_graham
Gold_n_graham

Take ur time & eat every one of ur words now. The pretty boys of Miama have not lived up to their self-appointed glory. And shame on Wade & Lebron for mocking Dirk. I expect that from Lebron, but not from Wade, who I really thought was a lot more mature & classy. They should really learn some humility. God don't like ugly.

Adam
Adam

The JET took his talents to Miami tonight and brings home the real trophy!!

Serg
Serg

Somebody asked Lebron for change on a dollar. Lebron told the person , " Sorry I only have 3 quarters . " .

The Mavs look like they want it more , with that said , LETS GO HEAT!!!!!!!!!!!

Sportsfan
Sportsfan

He got the tatto before the season. what's your point? No one picked Dallas until as of late.

Melo812010
Melo812010

ur a typical Miami fan... sore winners n losers... so sad... he got the tattoo for motivation at the beginning of the season... now whos the Hater....

Nick Ocheltree
Nick Ocheltree

Terry has backed up every bit of his talk. Call me when LeBron does the same.

Miam Heat Playa
Miam Heat Playa

jason terry is a fairy,miami in 7 you hating bunch of ignorant a holes.suck on that dallas.

Lollerman
Lollerman

Miami is so sensitive. Instead of Terry's tattoo how about you find out where Lebron went in the 4th Quarter.

Mavs Fan!
Mavs Fan!

Omg!!!!! Was that not an awesome game? Go Mavs!!!!!

brigitte
brigitte

The Heat should stop acting so unprofessional and insecure. They give Miami a bad name. GO DIRK!!!!!! GO MAVS!!!!!!!

heat fan
heat fan

Jason Terry is an IDIOT!!!! bwaa haa haa.. I hope it hurts really bad when he get's that dumb tattoo removed after the finals. What a douchebag. Lol

Mavs Fan!
Mavs Fan!

Miami are you nervous now? You darn right you are!

Mrs.White5
Mrs.White5

omg does it really matter what tattoo he has??? Chris Bosh needs to have a rainbow tat forreal since you want to say what tat's Terry should have... and LeBron needs tissue b/c he aint nothin but a big cry baby........ Please get over it!!!!! Miami is not all that!!!!! the team or the city!!lmao

Luiscarlos75
Luiscarlos75

Great Article!!! Loved it!! Laughed all the way through!!

Lolz
Lolz

This is garbage

Mavs Fan!
Mavs Fan!

Sounds like someone is bait upset!!!

Telizondo01
Telizondo01

Wow! I didn't think people still used the word douchebag. Go Mavs!!!

heat fan
heat fan

No the Heat are not nervous. Neither are their fans. Why would we be?

Telizondo01
Telizondo01

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you!!!!! GO MAVS!!!!!!!!!!!

Telizondo01
Telizondo01

Because you all expected to take this series all the way and that isn't happening the series is tied, and when you have won it's not by a landslide. The trio was made out to be the best, great,etc and that's not happening. All drama!!! GO MAVS!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
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