From about 4 to 7 p.m., when the rest of the world transitions from work to home, Miami comes alive with the promise of cheap booze, cheaper conversation, and tawdry romance. Even before nightlife swings, our bars, restaurants, nightclubs, and lounges pour their liquid goodness down our parched throats.
C. Stiles
Democratic Republic of Beer
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No matter what you wear or what you clear in a year, there's a happy hour for you in this town. At Burger & Beer Joint in Miami Beach, the bartenders will gargle your shot of Jameson before you imbibe. The bathrooms at Balans in Mary Brickell Village have clear glass partitions, which can be tricky if you have to go number two.
There's a lot you should know about happy hours in this town. But mostly, you need to know which one is right for you. To that end, we present our list of the 50 coolest happy hours in Miami. Consider this your happy-hour cheat sheet. Read up before you drink up.
All About the Beer
Cocktails might be the happy-hour drinks of record, but beer is booze stripped of pretense. These bars are best known for their selection and, in some cases, their house-made brews.
Democratic Republic of Beer, 255 NE 14th St., Miami; 305-372-4161; drbmiami.com. One minute you'll be drinking a German Köstritzer in the empty Democratic Republic of Beer — lovingly known as DRB — and five minutes later, three groups of five ladies will appear to take up about every bar seat, couch, and table. For a place that specializes in beer, there sure are a lot of hot women who show up for this happy hour. The tight digs and stylish interior (props for the tastefully done mirrors on the ceiling) only add to the allure. Juxtapose these feminine attributes with 400 varieties of brewski and you have some pretty good conversation. Worried the DRB might be going soft? Take note. Its happy-hour special features 16 six-pack varieties (with six unique beers in each) at any one time. Some are great deals as cheap as the $15 "Po Boy" (including Pabst Blue Ribbon). Then there's the "Macdaddy Six Pack of All Six Packs" (we'd mention the names, but they would be lost on most of us) for $65, which we are told is actually a good deal. Happy hour: Monday through Friday 4 to 7:30 p.m. Special six-pack beer menu varies.
The Yard House, 320 San Lorenzo Ave., Coral Gables; 305-447-9273; yardhouse.com. Think of a bank drive-thru lane, except when it comes time to put in a canister with your deposit slip, you throw in a huge beer goblet. Then you receive copious amounts of alcoholic goodness from around the world. That's the Yard House. Its oversize bar is encircled by 130 taps, which are connected to a sleek metal tube running overhead. It can take you all night just to fill out a withdrawal slip for a brew. There are ales, stouts, porters, fruit lambics, lagers, bitters, and even draft beer floats. There are almost as many menu items (109) as beers, with happy-hour specials on four different sliders for $6, as well as half-price pizzas and appetizers. The place is devoted to classic rock (it's actually part of the tag line: "Great Food. Classic Rock."). It plays Zeppelin and Rush loud, so stay away if you aim to posit philosophical treatises on your close group of beatnik friends. Happy hour: Monday through Friday 3 to 6 p.m. Late-night happy hour: Sunday through Wednesday 10 p.m. to closing. Domestic pints $3.50, imports $4.25, goblets $4.75, and well drinks $4.25. Sliders $6.75 and half off select pizzas and appetizers.
Town Kitchen & Bar, 7301 SW 57th Ct., South Miami, 305-740-8118; townkitchenbar.com. Think Sex and the Small City, and you have Town, South Miami's happy hour for the professional adult who's not quite ready to settle into middle age. Carrie Bradshaw and the gang would especially like Thursday nights, when ladies get free champagne and the bar crowds go about three deep. The sleek postindustrial décor with exposed concrete and metallic tubes lends an air of sophistication matched by the menu, which includes a page of single-malt Scotches, artisanal cheese plates, and lobster quesadillas. Town brings the uppity down a bit with its wide selection of large-format beers (about equal to three regular-size drafts). Once a month, beermeister Jeff Ambler has a special tasting of brews he discovers. Happy hour: Daily 4 to 7 p.m. Half off everything, including bottle wines up to $200. Ladies get free champagne Thursday 4 to 7 p.m.
Titanic Restaurant & Brewery, 5813 Ponce de Leon Blvd., Coral Gables, 305-668-1742; titanicbrewery.com. Management says only about 30 percent of Titanic’s patrons come from the University of Miami although the microbrewery is only about half a block from campus. It makes sense considering your average undergrad hasn’t developed the beer palate to appreciate what goes on here. Titanic delivers some of the best ales, stouts, and bitters in town; a dozen or so house beers are always on tap. There’s White Star India Pale Ale — the Yank version of an English classic — and the Triple Screw Light Ale — a rich man’s version of a light beer sold for $2 Monday and Wednesday. The chef is Mississippi-born, which explains some of the better food offerings, including shrimp, grits, and jambalaya. Things really get cooking on $6 burger night. Happy hour: Daily 4 to 8 p.m. Slight discounts on all house brews.
