Our Balls Are Oblong

A A A Comments By JOE LAPIN Thursday, Jan 21 2010

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Attention, husbands of South Florida: Keep a watchful eye on your wives, because this weekend, Pro Bowlers will pillage Miami. And we're not talking about the Pro Bowlers Association. We're talking about the Ochocinco-name-changing, 40-year-old Brett Favre-playing, Sparano-wildcatting National Football League. The streets will be filled with so much manpower that dudes weighing less than 120 pounds are encouraged to stay home to avoid offending the swaggering brick houses.

This Sunday at 7:30 p.m., the 2010 NFL Pro Bowl leaves Honolulu and heads to our glorious pantheon: Sun Life Stadium (2267 Dan Marino Blvd., Miami). Sadly, Jake Long, the Miami Dolphins' star offensive tackle, will represent the Fish from the sidelines owing to injury. But we'll still be able to watch Larry Fitzgerald, Tom Brady, Ed Reed, and 82 other football stars take their playoff woes out on the opposing players. Come watch touchdowns, pancakes, and game-changing hits in this preview of next weekend's Super Bowl.
Sun., Jan. 31, 7:30 p.m., 2010

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What's happening in town? From underground club nights to the biggest outdoor festivals, our top picks for the week's best events will always keep you in on the action.