Hello, Kitty: After a few dates with an extremely successful businessman, I accepted an invite back to his place. He's handsome (also 10 to 15 years my senior), and I wanted to hook up. After a round of mediocre sex, we were lounging on the bed when he scooped up some cum and ate it. Shocked, I pretended like I didn't see it. A bit later, things were getting a little hot and heavy again. Kneeling above me, he began to choke me, double-handed. He is a pretty huge guy, at least twice my size. It wasn't your normal one-handed hot-sex choke. It was a slow, double-handed, hard choke. He did it in stride, so I couldn't even question it. Was that normal?
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Ready to make a smooth exit, I started to gather my clothes. At this point, his dog jumped onto the bed and began furiously humping his arm — he allowed it for quite some time. I might even say he participated in it. Normal? Now, one of these things I maybe could have dealt with. But this is triple-threat weird, right? Am I wrong?
Beth Less
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Hey, Beth: Normal is one of those words that can be tricky to define, especially when it comes to sex. What one couple deems normal is another's "only on birthdays" or "Ew! No! Never!" In my world, it's not really normal for a man to eat his own semen. It's one thing if he happens to be on the giving end of a blowjob, swallows, and ingests the cum. But scooping up a handful of the stuff and making a snack of it seems quite unnecessary. With you lying beside him, there was more than enough to eat, so he might have thought the sheer kinkiness would make you forget his mediocre performance.
The choke? I'm on the fence about this one. When you get into bed with someone, you never know what type of fuckery he's into. Ideally, a gentleman wouldn't put a lady into a sleeper hold without asking. But maybe he never found the right time to bring up the subject. Or maybe he assumed you would be turned on by it. Maybe he just likes to choke. Was it normal? Depends. But if it wasn't normal for you, I suggest shutting it off when the sex gets too rough, because men often get so deep into the moment they forget where they are. Not that it's your fault, but it's your life. A simple scream or wail will let him know he's gone too far. Or try saying, "Hey, I'm gonna need some breath to blow you later." He'll chill.
Allowing his dog to hump his arm. Normal? No. But you were leaving. How else would he get his rocks off?
Can't say he's weird, but he's def into some kinky shit. And because he's an "extremely successful" older man, he's probably used to girls letting him have his freaky way. Telling him how you feel might not get results, but if you want another go with him, it's worth the effort. Meow.
