"Soon my grandparents had a string of good luck and within a year were able to save up $10,000 to open their own business."
Raquel's boyfriend, Raul de Douchebag, once had a pretty unique good-luck charm: a purple lace thong. "Back when I wrestled in college, I lost a bet to one of my friends, and the result was that I had to wear a thong under my uniform during a match. Which I did and ended up kicking my opponent's ass. So the match after that, I decided to try the thong on again, and whooped that bitch as well. I had such good luck when wearing that thong that I would wear it when I went out clubbing and would get girls' numbers and hook up left and right."
"But that thing backfired on me one day. I wore it during a match, and won again, but the next day I discovered a weird circle on my chin. Ends up I got ringworm from one of the mats. After that, I threw out the thong. I don't like to waste my time with anything that doesn't benefit me."
And as I catch Raul casually brushing his fingers against Raquel's left boob, all I can think is, Good luck with that one, hon.