By Terrence McCoy
By Allie Conti
By Chuck Strouse
By Scott Fishman
By Terrence McCoy
By Ryan Yousefi
By Ciara LaVelle, Kat Bein, Carolina Del Busto, and Liz Tracy
By Pepe Billete
Two weeks ago, my girl came down from Orlando to visit for the weekend. I was stoked to spend time with her because we've been in a long-distance relationship since January and have seen each other only six times since then. I made plans for us to do all the things that in-town couples do, and she seemed like she was having a great time. Then, on Saturday, she decided to go have dinner with some of her college friends. I was a little pissed she would let her girls cut into our time, but I decided to be a cool boyfriend and let her go. Once she was out, she sent me a text: There was a cute girl at the table. I know she fools around with girls, but I assumed she was just casually mentioning the girl's hotness, so I texted back, "Cool." The night went on, and we texted back and forth about meeting up later. Then, around midnight, all communication ceased. I had no idea what was going on and eventually fell asleep on my couch — pissed. She waltzed in the next morning all casual and said, "I fucked her." I couldn't believe it. I told her to pack her shit and go. She apologized, but I insisted she leave. Now I regret it. Should I have told her to go? Is it too late to smooth everything over and get back to normal?
If by "normal" you mean being a pushover — sure, you can get back to that. Send her flowers with a note that reads, "Come back — you never told me the story," letting her know not only are you cool with the events of that night but also you want to giggle and gasp with her over the juicy details. The only mistake you've made so far is kicking her out of the house over a little snatch she obviously couldn't resist. So, no, it's definitely not too late to smooth shit over. If you consistently allow her to walk all over you, she'll certainly return to dust off her Manolos on your back a few more times. Those things can get dirty when you're running the streets with no leash all night. You have a smart girl with huge cojones, son, so I can see why you want her back. She comes to visit you but has the good sense to make the most out of her trip. Why spend a three-day weekend in Miami suckin' and fuckin' a spineless manatee?
And hey, did you get my sarcasm? You actually did the right thing by kicking her out. My answer has gone on a bit longer than it should, because I really have only two words of advice for you: Man up.
P.S. Maybe this "girl" she met was really a guy. I'm digging the fact that you trust her word, but consider this: She could have brought the other chick home for you to share (or at least watch), but she didn't. And she failed to even let you know what was going on. You already know she fucks girls. You're not meant to know if she's fuckin' other dudes, right? Sounds fishy. Meow.