You Better Watch Out

You turned your back when the leftover holiday stuff turned up near the Halloween supplies on store shelves in October, and you couldn’t believe your ears when the muzak version of “White Christmas” drifted through the speakers when you were shopping at Publix last weekend. You can’t ignore it forever — the holidays are here. And there’s no more obvious sign than the annual Miracle on 136th Street Parade. For 12 years, it has been shutting down The Falls and its environs with local school bands, bagpipes, junkanoo bands, mariachis, and floats. If ever there were a day you wished Miami had gotten its Metrorail situation together, it’s today.

If you’re a big ol’ Scrooge, you will want to avoid the area completely. The parade begins at 4 p.m., and years past have seen upwards of 20,000 spectators lining the streets to catch a first glimpse of Santa Claus. This year’s celebrity grand marshal is Meaghan Jette Martin, “Tess Tyler” from Disney’s summer movie hit Camp Rock. That will matter only to your teenage kids. For everyone else, there will be a bunch of local politicians mugging and posing in the way of the revelry, a Chinese dragon, stilt-walkers, Florida Marlins Mermaids, and just a general celebratory Christmas clusterfuck. Bah, humbug? You didn’t hear it from us. Admission is free, and after the parade, the kiddies can take photos with Santa at The Falls.
Sat., Nov. 22, 2008