By Nick Schager
By Stephanie Zacharek
By Zachary Wigon
By Alan Scherstuhl
By Calum Marsh
By Stephanie Zacharek
By Miami New Times Staff
By Hans Morgenstern
Explosions, pratfalls, and robots; heroes, aliens, and blondes — it must be summertime at the movies.
Beyond the flash, though, it's striking to note just how many movies will require us to actually think this summer — aren't we supposed to save thinking for the fall? Maybe it's the election, but there are some pretty serious and intense flicks coming our way. And so, as an act of solidarity, we're taking the pledge: For every movie we see that's playing on more than one screen at the multiplex, we hereby vow to see one film that might be good for us. Because after all, as with pop idols and presidents, we get the movies we deserve.
THRILLS & CHILLS: The summer in action and horror
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Man. Hat. Whip.
The Incredible Hulk
Edward Norton goes green.
Will Smith plays a modern-day superhero who's becoming more famous for being drunk than for his ability to lift a whale with one hand.
Hellboy: The Golden Army
The Dark Knight
Midnight Meat Train
Bradley Cooper stars as a Manhattan photographer who becomes obsessed with finding a subway serial killer. The first in a series of films to be based on Clive Barker's hard-core horror collection "Books of Blood."
The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor
Brendan Fraser, lifelong mummy catcher, goes to China.
Nicholas Cage is a hit man on assignment in this action thriller from China's talented Pang Brothers (The Eye), here remaking their 1999 debut film.
Vin Diesel in a near-future world all gone to hell, trying to protect a woman whose baby will be the next Messiah. Don't worry: Vin will save us.
BUT SERIOUSLY, FOLKS: The summer in drama
Henry Poole Is Here
A dying man (Luke Wilson) is forced to face his religious beliefs when his neighbors begin to see Christ's face in a stain on the side of his house.
Although it's probably the last film people would have expected him to helm, rock star Fred Durst makes his directorial debut with the true story of the teenage girl who became the first female to play on a Pop Warner football team. Akeelah and the Bee's Keke Palmer stars, with Ice Cube as the coach.
TAKE THE KIDS: The summer in family fare
Kung Fu Panda
The new computer toon from Pixar director Andrew Stanton (Finding Nemo) takes place 700 years in the future when a lonely Earth robot called WALL-E and a sleek 'bot from space named EVE team up for adventure.
Journey to the Center of the Earth 3D
Brendan Fraser digs deep.
Animated monkeys blast into space to head off approaching aliens.
Fly Me to the Moon
Animated 3-D astronaut-flies (very cute flies) go to the moon.
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2
A LAUGH RIOT: The summer in comedy, romantic and otherwise
German action director Uwe Boll — a.k.a. the man bloggers love to hate — pokes fun at contemporary America in this comedy about two thieves who run afoul of Osama bin Laden and George W. (traveling separately) while planning a heist.
Sex and the City: The Movie
You Don't Mess with the Zohan
The Love Guru
Mike Myers dons a Mahatma beard and golden swami robes to play an American raised in India who dreams of becoming a Brooklyn hairstylist (or America's go-to self-help guru). With Jessica Alba and Justin Timberlake.
Dave (Eddie Murphy) is an alien, new to Earth. He tries to adjust to Manhattan life, all the while being supervised by a command post of tiny (alien) people in his head (whom we see).
On the eve of the presidential election, one drunken ne'er-do-well (Kevin Costner) has the power to cast the sole deciding vote. Could be nonfiction.
Seth Rogen and James Franco are stoned on the best weed of their life, and also running for their lives from a killer cop in a film penned by Rogen and his Superbad writing partner Evan Goldberg and directed by indie darling David Gordon Green. (Admission is half price if you bring your own bong.)
Ben Stiller (who also directs), Jack Black, and Robert Downey Jr. go all Rambo as Hollywood actors who don't realize their military training is actually in a real war. With Tom Cruise in a fat-suit cameo all the world wants to see (including you).
The House Bunny
Ditzy Playboy Bunny Anna Faris becomes college sorority house mother, a plot line that must have made for a terribly efficient pitch meeting.
The Accidental Husband
DANCING QUEEN: The summer in ABBA films
* As with summer weather, baseball, and presidential race forecasts, all dates are subject to change.
Join My Voice Nation for free stuff, film info & more!
Find everything you're looking for in your city
Find the best happy hour deals in your city
Get today's exclusive deals at savings of anywhere from 50-90%
Check out the hottest list of places and things to do around your city