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Recent Articles By Patrice Elizabeth Grell Yursik

National Features

  • Village Voice
    A Long Way Wrong?

    Another celebrated memoir threatens to blow into a million little pieces.

    By Graham Rayman
  • LA Weekly
    Hoop Dawg

    Billionaire Donald T. Sterling owns the L.A. Clippers and loves the ladies. And those are just two of his problems.

    By Patrick Range McDonald
  • The Pitch
    Children of the Porn

    Elvin Boone's sex-shop empire crumbles as his offspring feud.

    By Justin Kendall
  • Westword
    The Good Soldier

    When the Army tried to take down Andrew Pogany, they messed with the wrong coward.

    By Joel Warner

You’re a two-time foosball champ and can beat any fourth-grader in a game of arcade hoops, but your athletic prowess pretty much ends there. People like you are the reason some guy invented no-sweat versions of the classic sports, and we love you for it. Besides, no one can say you don’t work hard at it -- you leave a table hockey game as bloody as Wayne Gretzky after winning the Stanley Cup. Today marks the grand opening of another watered-down yet legendary sport, miniature golf, at the Palmetto Golf Course.

If you need a felt playing field and tiny windmills to stay up to par, you’re out of luck. This course is 18 holes and a half-acre of real putting green, palm trees, a waterfall, working waterways, and a walk-through tunnel. The authenticity will have you screaming for your caddy and a motorized golf cart, and renaming yourself Cub (a baby Tiger – Woods, that is). The course is open daily from 11:30 a.m. to 9:30 p.m., and fees start at five dollars.
Sun., March 23, 2008

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