Most Popular
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Kill Gus Boulis's Killer?
Paul Brandreth didn't want to murder anybody. Or did he?
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Silly Wabbit
So a guy in a bunny suit walks into a bar ...
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Mayor of the Nude Beach
So he's naked and in his seventies. He's still the coolest guy you'll ever meet.
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Poisoned Well
What was contaminating our drinking water? Who knows - Dade officials stopped looking.
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Ignored and Cheated
Farm workers earn nada in America's green bean capital.
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Sarnoff Shmarnoff (14)
Commissioner Marc's claim to a famous bloodline just might be fiction.
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Mayor of the Nude Beach (5)
So he's naked and in his seventies. He's still the coolest guy you'll ever meet.
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The Reporter and the Tranny (4)
He kissed her, um, him, and that was only the beginning.
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Barack Obama Naked! (3)
If you could enjoy sensual pleasure with Hillary Clinton, would you? Really?
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Wine and Food Fest Pops the Cork (2)
SoBe’s culinary extravaganza gets under way.
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Sigher Education
Get your Ph.D. in bOINK-ing today.
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Wear a Cup
Old-school comedians can handle you hecklers.
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Making Shit Up
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The Shape of History
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Nothing Corny About It
At MBC, learn more about America’s most ubiquitous grain.
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Magic City Kitty - I Saw Titties!
08:59AM 03/24/08 -
Over The Weekend - Activist Bike Riders, A Rapper and A Bunch of Wrestlers.
08:57AM 03/24/08 -
Side-scrolling Sonic (Sort Of)
08:52AM 03/24/08 -
Last Night: Jay-Z's Intimate Gig at the Fillmore
09:20AM 03/24/08 -
Last Night: George Thorogood and the Destroyers
09:14AM 03/24/08 -
WMC Preview! Q&A with Louie Vega
12:29PM 03/20/08
What we are writing about
- Art Basel
- Arturo Sandoval Jazz Club
- Carnival Center
- Coconut Grove
- Coral Gables
- downtown Miami
- Fillmore Miami Beach
- Fort Lauderdale
- Francisco Goya
- Freedom Tower
- Hugo Chávez
- In the Continuum
- John Timoney
- Julia Tuttle Causeway
- Karen Kilimnik
- Marc Sarnoff
- Miami-Dade County Library
- Miami-Dade County...
- Miami Beach
- Miami local art
- Miami local music
- Miami local theater
- Museum of Contemporary...
- Patrick Williams
- sex offenders
- South Beach
- South Miami
- Studio A
- Wii
- Xbox
Recent Articles By KYLE MUNZENRIEDER
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Culture, Not Cocaine
Pablo Is Gone traffics in Colombia’s traditions, not its drug trade.
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Red Carpet Rollups
The search for America’s next top cigar roller heats up.
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Thar They Blow
Sailers can back up all your hot air.
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Warm Up Your Leatherette
Fetish scene whips back into shape in Hollywood.
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Global Warming Can Be Glamorous
All this and more at the Yacht and Brokerage Show.
National Features
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Village Voice
A Long Way Wrong?
Another celebrated memoir threatens to blow into a million little pieces.
By Graham Rayman -
LA Weekly
Hoop Dawg
Billionaire Donald T. Sterling owns the L.A. Clippers and loves the ladies. And those are just two of his problems.
By Patrick Range McDonald -
The Pitch
Children of the Porn
Elvin Boone's sex-shop empire crumbles as his offspring feud.
By Justin Kendall -
Westword
The Good Soldier
When the Army tried to take down Andrew Pogany, they messed with the wrong coward.
By Joel Warner
Joe Torre's Revenge
Marlins eye another chance to embarrass legendary manager.
By KYLE MUNZENRIEDER
Published: March 13, 2008
“On the sixth day, God created Man, and on the seventh day, he made some of those men into New York Yankees so he could watch some good baseball as he rested.” This was the Gospel according to ex-Yankees manager Joe Torre, until he failed to fulfill the team's manifest destiny of winning yearly championships. The last time the Yanks played in a World Series matchup, they got shut out by the blasphemous Florida Marlins. Torre hasn't made it back to the big games. Hell, he hasn't even beaten the Marlins in any series since.
And the last time the Yankees played Florida, his third baseman was paid more than the entire Marlins roster combined, and they still lost the series 2-1. This continued failure was an abomination unto the Lord, and Torre was cast down to the city of fallen angels, where he's now the skipper for the Los Angeles Dodgers. In a bid for Torre's redemption, his new squad takes on the Fish today at 1:05 p.m. during a spring training game at Roger Dean Stadium.
Tue., March 18, 1:05 p.m., 2008
