Johnny SexFuk and the Fleshrockets

When last we left Johnny SexFuk, a pumpkin was about to get its brains — or seeds, whatever — fucked out. That was back around Halloween, when the Hialeah-based punk troupe lowered its standards all the way down to the magma level by playing back-up band during a porn stunt, wherein one lucky sophisticate won a few bucks by banging a jack-o-lantern. This epic Shakespearean study of the human condition later led to a couple of hot chicks getting body-painted in jungle animal patterns and then similarly used by men with penises, although the chicks were marginally more articulate — if less enthusiastic — than the large orange gourd. And life went on.


Johnny SexFuk, Jimmy's Chicken Shack, and Chalk perform Friday, January 18, at Churchill's Pub, 5501 NE 2nd Ave, Miami. The show starts at 8 p.m., and tickets cost $5. Those 18 and older are welcome with ID. Call 305-757-1807, or visit

Cut to today, with Johnny SexFuk and the Fleshrockets once again preparing to bring their warm, refined surf-punk roadkill to Churchill's spotlessly clean stage. Will men disguised as robots gang-bang a refrigerator? Will a well-heeled gent allow a scorpion to pinch his nut sack? Will I ever be able to stop dreaming of pumpkins with runny mascara?

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