Have Yourself a Nastie Little Christmas

They say the suicide rate increases at yuletide, and you believe it as you walk the lonely streets of downtown Miami, kicking an empty soda can. Depression builds as you pass the Salvation Army lady with red cheeks who’s ringing her little bell outside Publix. A man on the dark corner is holding up a piece of cardboard that says, “Happy Holidays, Please Help.” You open your wallet and it’s empty. A dude with a Santa hat walks by singing “Jingle Bell Rock.” But wait! Isn’t that the infamous party promoter Notorious Nastie? “Follow me,” he says in his signature hoarse voice. “I’m throwing a Christmas party for scumbags like you.” He leads you into the dark club known as PS 14, and you suddenly feel good again.

At Nastie and Otto’s Christmas Extravaganza, performances will include “Jingle Bass” by Dynamix II, “Christmasouras” by Bubble Gum Octopus, “Hannukahcore” by DJ Schematico, and a duet titled “Nastie the Fatman” featuring Otto Von Schirach. Be there tonight at 9. For admission costs and more information, call 305-358-3600 or check out www.myspace.com/notoriousnastiemusic.
Sat., Dec. 22, 9 p.m., 2007