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    Michele Bachmann, Unmuzzled

    You don't need to read Sarah Palin's book to hear the ravings of a mad woman.

    By Matt Snyders

  • Riverfront Times

    Babe 'n' Arms

    Tom was a hot-tempered cross-dresser with a garage full of guns--and then he became Rachel.

    By Nicholas Phillips

  • Dallas Observer

    The Fight for Texas

    Rick Perry and Kay Bailey Hutchison are locked in a battle over the soul of the GOP. They're also running for governor.

    By Sam Merten

A Moment Like This

It’s gonna be a little pitchy at the AAA

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By Dan Renzi

Published on August 16, 2007 at 3:00am

So let’s say you woke up this morning and thought, Today I’d like to humiliate myself beyond all comprehension, in front of millions of people. How do I do this? We have the answer. Today, you masochist, the Miami auditions for American Idol are at the American Airlines Arena, and of course the lines will be long. According to the American Idol Web site, “No one will be allowed to line up prior to 6:00 a.m. August 20.... Registration continues to the morning of August 22.”

Please don’t be one of those idiots who shows up in a clown costume in the hopes the cameras will catch you. Just because you are on TV, it doesn’t mean you are “famous.” Other than that, it’s anyone’s guess as to who will make it big these days, so why not give it a shot? And hey, you also might want to go if you can really sing. Although we hate to say it, all those people you laugh at thought they could sing too. Think about it.
Wed., Aug. 22