Jeezy Christ!

Sometimes snow isn't just snow. Sometimes it's cocaine.

Young Jeezy will be back in Miami this weekend; back, one might say, to the scene of the (alleged) crime. The handsome hip-hopper from Georgia was arrested this past March in Miami Beach and charged with two counts of carrying a concealed firearm without a permit (in an SUV, no less).

But don't get the wrong idea. Young Jeezy's interview in March's XXL — which came out in advance of this little Escalade escapade — reveals what we've suspected since he adopted that adorably disgruntled cartoon snowman as his logo: The guy is a straight-up comedian. How else to explain the contradictions, the unintentional hilarity that met writer Kris Ex's probing? What follows are snatches that fly in the face of the Atlanta native's musical persona (the lyric quotes from his album Let's Get It are but many examples, for Jeezy's subject matter isn't exactly varied). Here Jeezy's throwing yellow ice and telling us it's snowing.

XXL: "[My music] ain't no shit that I'm telling a muthafucka, 'Shoot a nigga, kill a nigga.' ... Fuck beefing and killing each other....'"

Let's Get It: "Shoot first and ask questions later...." in "Last of a Dying Breed"; "Leave holes in ya the size of a sunroof" in "Gangsta Music": pacifist, who? Let's Get It's pervasive gang-banging, slanging, and violence lend delicious irony to its status as a "motivational" work. Does Jeezy not get his own point?

XXL: "Money's nothing.... If it was about the money you would keep the money for the car and not get the car. You'd just be happy for the fact that you got the money...." You don't need an MBA to understand the obviousness here. Unless, that is, it contradicts your graphic, homespun hyperbole:

Let's Get It: "Still get a hard-on when I count that cash" in "Let's Get It/Sky's the Limit": He might not love it that much, but he loves it that much.

XXL: "Da Snowman is the ultimate hustler it represents something. Show me anywhere on that shirt that says anything about narcotics, anything on that shirt that says anything about violence." It doesn't say anything on the shirt because, as Jeezy seems to be somewhat cognizant of, it's a symbol. And not just any symbol, a symbol that represents him (a fact made indisputable by his constant proclamation that he's "Da Snowman").

Let's Get It: "Y'ain't never seen them pies/Talkin' so much white, it'll hurt your eyes...." in "Thug Motivation 101"; "Hide the rest of the yams at my auntie house...." in "And Then What"; "In the rap game, takin' niggas' clientele/White ones like the powder that I used to sell...." in "Gangsta Music": Pies, white, yams, and powder all represent something too. Sometimes snow isn't just snow. Sometimes it's cocaine.

All of this comes from the self-proclaimed "realest nigga." Artifice in pop music is nothing to be shocked about, but Jeezy's problem is he can't even maintain it. If Jeezy cut his snow, his white, his yams with different powder, he'd lose business. You have to wonder what kind of hit he'll take now that he's clearly cutting his words with bullshit.

 
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