Letters from the Issue of April 13, 2006

For Johnny Boy: Your man Francisco Alvarado is still on it with his amusing story, "Johnny Too Bad" (February 23), about Johnny Winton's stint as an obnoxious, belligerent, and outright pompous ass of an MC at the opening of One Brickell Broadway — a rental property. I guess rental-party MCs are used-car salesmen compared to the $900,000 studio-purchase-price condo parties. Mr. Alvarado might have taken some poetic liberty in his report, such as: Winton, who supplements his $58,200 salary with as many complimentary all-you-can-eat buffets, free swill, and pockets of commission payola while loudly smacking his lips on the ass of the potential management company.... I've done a few of these events — duh! — how else would you have a $100K income from property management? We would like to know what kind of cheap crap epicurean delights Johnny was serving (probably catered by Hooters). Besides making an ass of himself and wiping the brown stuff from his lips, he had no reservations about implementing a Napoleonic insistence that the crowd listen to his developer buddy's sales pitch. Then he became insulted when no one cared and mentioned, "The proper protocol is for me to connect my brain to my mouth before opening it big enough to shove both of my feet in."

Surely a seasoned "commissioner" such as Johnny Bad Apple is well aware that people don't give a shit about a new condo, rental building, or anything else that offers free food and drink. They just want to have a good time. Sounds like it's Sir Johnny who needs another drink. Why not make it a (bad) apple martini? They're free.

Dean Corso
Miami