New Pollution

Beck's new Guero is okay, but it ain't no Odelay

This man's maturation process needs to be impaired, blockaded, and halted completely. Guero is a wonderful, innovative, safe album Beck should never make again. As L. Ron Hubbard suggested, "Let's get retarded." Get stupid, get ridiculous, get crass, and get absurd. Dali, not Dylan. For I still carry proudly a hyper-specific memory of listening to 1994's "Pay No Mind" while languishing in a Taco Bell drive-thru, laughing like an idiot when Beck mumbled, "Like a giant dildo crushing the sun," as though it were scripture. Because it was, in point of fact, scripture. Please, Satan, sell us another taco.

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