Showing Off

If dads in the Midwest knew what some of their daughters were doing on South Beach, their meta-seismic cardiac arrests would cause tidal waves across Lake Michigan. Every adventure for the throngs of college students hitting our beaches this month will assuredly end in a bedroom romp or rounds of yacking into a toilet. But of all the obligatory spring break pastimes, exposing yourself is the most fun for everybody. Take last Tuesday at Automatic Slim's, for instance. A contingent of Chicago-area babes broke out in aGirls Gone Wild moment when a clothing company, Whiteboy, began to give away T-shirts. One after the other, natural blondes climbed the small stage at Slim's, ripping off the tops they came in, and dancing around the stripper pole, many of them nibbling on other girls' bare breasts. The exhibition was well received by the crowd, many of whom wondered whether it was a staged treat or a case of young women who really valued free T-shirts.

Humberto Guida

Out of school, on the town

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And displaying one's personal assets is not limited only to ladies. The warm weather and sugary, multiliquor drinks offered at favored spring break spots such as Wet Willie's and Slim's have inspired many a young, out-of-town male to share with others the fact that he shaves his balls. Not that I am paying close attention, but the whole pubic trimming, or shaving, trend has apparently caught on with men on a grand scale. It's silly, though, for hairy guys to have a sweater of follicles all over their body and a waxed-down package. If you don't want fuzzy balls, spare yourself the furry back. That's my take.

Automatic Slim's is located at 1216 Washington Ave, Miami Beach. Call 305-695-0795. Wet Willie's is located at 760 Ocean Dr, Miami Beach. Call 305-532-5650.