Second Chants

Okay, so your depraved decadent lifestyle just hit a low point last night on New Year's Eve, and now you're nursing a mean hangover and you're sure your soul is beyond salvation. Take heart and set the New Year straight with some soul-cleansing chants from the monks of Drepung Loseling Monastery of Tibet.

Famed for their unique multiphonic singing known as jok-kay (low tone) and bar-da (high tone), the chantmasters intone three notes simultaneously, individually creating a complete chord. The vibrating vocal drone music builds in tension with a rise in pitch and volume from the singers and the accompanying gyaling horns and ten-foot-long dungchen trumpets, until it climaxes with a crash of drums, cymbals, and bells. Then it starts all over again, sort of like your life.

The Buddhist monks are sponsored by Richard Gere and have performed with the likes of Philip Glass, Paul Simon, and the Beastie Boys. Drag your sorry butt out of bed and get over to the Jackie Gleason by 7:00 p.m. And if you can't make it by then, you need more help than the monks can give.