Donít Get Holidazed!

Holiday Gift Guide 2001

Gym Bunny
It's Friday night. Do you know where your best friend is? While you're knocking back mojitos at happy hour, your regimented, obsessive pal is, without fail, sweating bullets in the gym, working off the calories consumed when the #*$&$%&^ guy at Starbucks failed to use fat-free milk in her latte. Since you know you're not gonna get her taut ass out of the gym anytime soon in favor of a late-night binge of cheese fries and buffalo wings at Denny's, you may as well invest your money in a gift she's going to use. Over and over and over again. The Body Fat Analyzer/Scale measures the body fat percentage in addition to total weight in pounds and kilograms (it's a psychological thing). Perhaps it can work to your benefit, too, when you finally have proof that vodka really is fat-free.
$99.95, Sharper Image,
Aventura Mall,
19501 Biscayne Blvd., 305-937-4333;
Dadeland Mall,
7507 Kendall Dr., 305-667-9970;
Bayside Marketplace,
401 Biscayne Blvd., 305-374-8539;

The Follically Endowed
If we took all the hair off the backs of ungroomed men everywhere, we'd probably have enough hair to wipe out male pattern baldness. And while this theory is indeed too good to be true, individuals can take action and at least make their own walking Chia Pet's back as smooth as a baby's you-know-what with the Emjoi Beauty Forever Hair Remover, a nifty device that eliminates unwanted hair with radio energy that destroys it at its uncontrollable source--the root. To get to the root of this matter ever so meticulously, there's even a 24-karat gold plated tweezer to grip those pesky single hairs that just won't budge. If the thought of radio energy ripping out his hair is too much for the big guy to handle, liquor him up with a few cocktails and take him straight to South Beach Body Wax for some smooth sailing vis a vis a full back wax. FYI: they do other parts of the body too.
Beauty Forever Hair Remover, $69.95,
South Beach Body Wax, $30,
1352 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 305-531-3130

Traveling Wilbury
Regardless of the situation, they still schlep all over the place via plane. Good for them. But due to increased security, it's likely that their well-packed bags will be the object of a careful search (at least we hope so). They may even be forced to leave their Swiss Army-made travel kit at the gate. This wouldn't happen if your fave traveler carried the Hello Kitty Vacation Travel Container Set, which includes benign, yet whimsical, plastic necessities such as a soap case, a toothbrush case and three plastic bottles of varying sizes in which to store their most necessary youth- enhancing creams and salves.
$12, Cry Baby,
6669 Biscayne Blvd., 305-754-4279

Mark Poutenis
Mark Poutenis

Your dear cinemaniac has seen every movie known to man--even Ishtar. To miss a movie is worse than missing your own mother's birthday. And the obsession is not just confined to the theater. However, if it's not the theater, the living room, or someplace where they're showing a movie, the cinemaniac just won't go. To get the cinemaniac out of the celluloid cave, try baiting him or her with the Mobile Video Traveler, a 5-and-1/2-inch monitor screen, video player, carrying case and DC adapter that can be hooked up to any cigarette lighter in any car--the backseat, please. Sure, you'd have to drive, but it's better than you being driven crazy at home by a flick-obsessed hermit, isn't it?
$699.95, Sharper Image,
Aventura Mall,
19501 Biscayne Blvd., 305-937-4333;
Dadeland Mall,
7507 Kendall Dr., 305-667-9970;
Bayside Marketplace,
401 Biscayne Blvd., 305-374-8539;

American Girl
Forget Louis Vuitton, Fendi, Prada and Gucci. It's time you start buying American. Help your girl earn her fashion stars and stripes with this patriotic clutch by Fuchi Mama. A demure 9-by-5 inches, this fabulous piece of Americana is made of denim and is emblazoned with a hand-sequined and beaded American flag. You don't have to be Lee Greenwood to prove that you're proud to be an American, girl.

Nature Freak
The nature freak cries when someone accidentally steps on an ant. And God forbid you kill a fly. For every bug you've crushed, consider making up for it by buying the earthy one a dozen butterflies from Miami's very own Butterfly Mystique. To top it off, why not throw in two thousand ladybugs for good luck? If you step on one, at least there's 1999 left.
Dozen butterflies, $75; ladybugs,
$14.95/2000, Butterfly Mystique,
22601 SW 152nd Ave., Miami,

Superstitious Fashion Plate
Relying on good, old-fashioned lady luck just isn't enough for your terminally trendy friend. Put a label on the luck, and now you're talking. Enhance her good fortune--while depleting yours--with haute couturier Marc Jacobs' Multi Charm Bracelet, a delicate little silver number with dice, fruit and hearts. Sure, it looks like you bought it at the five and dime, but your friend will absolutely love it when she sees who made it. Besides, who ever said good luck came cheap?
$75, Scoop New York, 212-535-5577

Savvy Traveler
Louis Vuitton luggage is so Reagan era. Help the savvy traveler toss out his or her excessive baggage in favor of a sleek and chic suitcase designed by the Don Corleone of minimalism, Philippe Starck. Although it won't help you score a room at the Delano, this Starckian spin on the classic Samsonite will definitely earn its carrier status in the Wallpaper magazine club of trendy travel.
From $195,

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