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LettersPublished on March 26, 1998Memo to Tree-huggers: Get a Horse I'm looking forward to some polo games! Condos for Castro: Welcome to Freedom Tower Estates As punishment for Fidel Castro's lengthy misrule of Cuba, let the World Court sentence him to lifetime confinement in the campanile of Freedom Tower on Biscayne Boulevard. Here the maximum leader will be on top, as he has always preferred. He can dictate his colorful memoirs to Ileana Ros-Lehtinen, henceforth his private stenotypist. These duties shall absorb her day and night as she documents a cavalcade of formidable soliloquies. Sadly, the congresswoman will be forced to relinquish her post in Washington to fulfill this momentous task. Our proud tropical Bastille will also be home to Raœl Castro, former head of Cuba's military forces. His experience in these matters will qualify him to be honorary chief of building security. Disguised as a quincenera, Raœl will station himself at the reception desk in the lobby to screen potential visitors. Bacardi will provide him with an endless supply of fine rums to soften the blow of this lifestyle change. As his assistant, Sen. Jesse Helms will be a most capable night watchman, guarding the perimeter from unsavory and especially foreign-looking types. Variety will be added to Fidel's new life by nostalgic outings to Belle Glade, where he may, when moved by the spirit, wield a machete alongside his working brethren. Raœl's nights may be punctuated by the occasional wild foray to South Beach, where the clever denizens of the wee hours will provide him with fashion tips. The Diaz-Balart brothers would be talented resident managers of this exclusive retirement center, forever renouncing their interests in politics and the media. Absorbed in this microcosm of intrigue, slander, and gossip, they will blissfully pass their days. The Holy Father in Rome will be given the only set of keys to this miraculous edifice. Perhaps after the establishment of this true Little Havana, Cuba can rise like the phoenix and her people will finally be free to choose their own destiny. (Unfortunately I must use a pseudonym owing to the inflamed political climate of our city, even though this is a humorous fantasy.) Pier Tomasz Machote What's a Little Barricade Between Good Friends? In her article "The Great Barrier Beef" (March 12), Kathy Glasgow refers to the barrier at NE Seventh Avenue and 80th Street as the barricade from hell. I consider them all barricades from heaven. Crime and unwanted nonresident traffic have been reduced to such a degree that we are once again a residential neighborhood, not someone's shortcut. I am in agreement with association officers Heikki Talvitie and Jorge Zuloaga that moving the Seventh Avenue barricade to the north side of 80th Street would be very detrimental to the entire area. I also do not understand what the big deal is about having to drive a block or two to enter the Little River Club at its rear. Has anyone pointed out to Bob H. and Frank Y. that there is plenty of free parking available on 79th Street in front of the club? I didn't get to vote on the barricades issue because it predates my arrival in Shorecrest, but if it were brought before me today, I would vote yes and ask for even more barricades. Ernest M. Gonzalez Miami High: Be True to Your School
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