The Uneven Bars

Still, if you come looking for a Marlins game on Channel 33, forget it. No Channel 33 here. Just the New York Yankees and a motley-looking live band called Time Machine. Oy.

Hours: 11 a.m. to 6:00 a.m. ("depending on the crowd")
Happy Hour: 3:00 to 7:00 p.m., two-for-one drinks
Parking: Plenty, and free (but be careful late at night)
Boooooo! No excuse for no Marlins game

Olympic Fever? Don't ask, 'cause Curt hates the summer Olympics. Too namby-pamby since the end of the Cold War. No more big Russian women with hair on their chests. (And no more Marlin-lovin' lady customers for Thunder Alley, either, Curt.)